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Sunday, October 14, 2012

Stream of Consciousness

I've been wanting to try some 'stream of consciousness' for ages, though I had to do a bit of research. Have a read, the beginning of a short story...


what is that sound like some plane in the sky so blue yet those clouds moving so quick I see a dog last time I did this school where are they all now Gaz might be famous what have I done I done nothing I’m a waster wasted my life get up do something what’s the point a shark big teeth gone now wind’s picking up cold breeze from somewhere maybe it’s time zip up my coat where is she she said she’d come can’t trust any of ’em rest enjoy just relax when do I get the chance to do this coffee would be nice KFC past a KFC in the street can’t be bothered no money anyway work work and no money where does it what’s that noise a dolphin that’s a nice one oh look is that her no not her too tall walking away shit relax she said she would relax hungry cheese sandwich lasagne canteen bloody awful cold hard women in uniform not for me no old way too old yuck she’s the one I is that her could be hang on no damn sun’s out hot nice I’ll wait a little more no hurry might rain no it might rain then what umbrella damn had one left it at home shit why don’t I think she’s here wow looks good smiling that walk jesus that smile better get up no
“Hey.”
“Hey.” her hair great smell I can smell her wow windy perfume strong warm face wow touch lips warm sweet she’s great longer hot so hot that smile kills her eyes so brown deep love clouds heart I see a heart a big heart she’s great
“What’ya doing?”
“Nothin’” cinema plaza streets pizza ground no not that plaza show her off jesus her face smooth to touch smile oh god kiss now yes plaza colours shops look in windows meet the lads show her off yes grab her come on hold her warm breeze cold on back take her there her hand’s so warm
“Where we going?”
“Come on.”

Friday, October 12, 2012

Whimsical

This word keeps popping up, yes, I write whimsically because if I write seriously, I'd just fall over laughing or break down crying. Who needs serious books when all you have to do is turn on the news and see all the stupid real happenings which us monkeys do to each other? You need an escape, and I hope my books can do that for ya.
Got a comment on authonomy for MBAT...
Excellent, diabolical, funny stuff! I love your imagery and the dark whimsy of your work. Nicely crafted and well polished. Six stars! Best of luck with this!
Yes, it's diabolical, I sometimes think of 'Carry on' movies when I'm writing, everyone loved them at one moment or another. The Black and White films were the best.
And I found out the other day that a 10 year old kid is reading my 3rd book 'Rage of Atlantis', he doesn't understand the politics but he loves Sipho's story. Hope he can finish, for the sake of Sipho :-)

Monday, October 8, 2012

Revamped 2nd part from MBAT for competition

Well, I had a go at re-writing a small piece from 'Man by a tree' for a competition (644 words). Sharper, hopefully more 'bare', and it fits within the 800 word limit.

Eternal


Two cars totally trashed, a head-on collision in the pouring rain. One carried a mother with her daughters, the other a middle-aged businessman. The paramedics had reached the scene quickly, but could do nothing for them. They were still trying to breathe life into the mother when the strange man appeared.
Mingling with the passers-by who braved the storm for a few moments, he watched the more blood-curious moving closer to the mangled metal for a better view. The victims, now in shock, hovered towards him.
“Don’t worry, everything will be all right. This is not the end, only the continuation of your eternal flow.”
The mother held onto her children, drifting in a daze towards him. The middle-aged businessman, in a suit and tie, also began to move in his direction.
“Where are you going?” The strange man held his palm up.
“To…I’m…” said the suit, stopping in his tracks.
“Overtaking, were you? On a road where it’s forbidden? See that unbroken white line, it’s there for a reason... and I guess you were speeding too, huh?”
The suit stood still.
“What’s wrong with speeding? I do it all the time.”
“Sorry, I’m not taking you, you’re not on my list. Speeding, it shows a complete lack of respect.” The strange man glanced over to the roadside signalling the man aside. “There are others who will come for you.”
The suit was carrying something in his right hand.
Is that what I think it is?” The strange man pointed to the black object held in the suit’s hand, a mobile phone. Definitely not taking you.”
No sooner said, they heard a jabbering of tongues and fluttering of wings. The others had come to do their work.
“Hey, they’re so cute.” The suit greeted the little creatures as they flew around him. “Hello,” he said, as he gave them a smile. The next moment, the suit fell to the ground, feet roped up, and was being dragged off into the dark, dismal night.
“Hey! What? Hey!…Help!”
There were selfish monkeys like this everywhere around the world, doing whatever they wished with no regard for their fellow man. Perhaps they all took a questionnaire which allowed them to act this way, preferably a ‘Yes/No’ questionnaire, as that was all their self-centred little brains could handle.
“And do you… steal subordinates ideas and suggestions and take them as your own in the next board meeting?”
“Why, yes.”
“…Drive like an idiot with little or no regard for the law or fellow drivers?”
“Of course, yes.”
“…Take a hugely inflated salary with no qualms, knowing full well that it is undeserved, that what you do for it does not qualify it?”
“How do you think I got here today?”
“Please, yes or no.”
“Yes.”
“Do you sign a job description and take full responsibility for your actions and decisions?”
“No, that’s quite absurd.”
“Do you pass on responsibility to anyone else regardless of who they are, if your actions and decisions create a problem?”
“Yes. Isn’t that my job?”
“Please, I’m asking the questions here…Do you treat your fellow colleagues and subordinates with the respect they deserve?”
“No.”
“Congratulations, you’ve got the job! Here’s your inflated salary, a pass to the executive washroom, and your Audi keys.”
The four of them stood there as the the suit disappeared feet first and the scene unfolded with paramedics and other services completing their gruesome but honourable duties. The strange man opened up a portal.
“You’ll soon be home.”
The mother and her family had now changed shape and remembered their original goal, they were ready to return. Two angels came down through the portal and took the three souls in their arms, leading them into the light.
As the portal closed, the strange man took one final look. Shrugging his coat tight on his shoulders, he turned and left.

Latvia and the Ukraine

Okay, so, who is reading this blog from Latvia and the Ukraine? Please get in contact with me and I'll send you a book. Go to...
http://www.djc.yolasite.com/contact-dani-j-caile.php
Jottify is doing a competition which is 'right down my street'...but I've got no ideas for an 800 word story....there's still some time...maybe I cantake a scene from 'MBAT' and adapt it...yes, that's what I'll do...

Sunday, October 7, 2012

The Sunset Limited

Been analysing the non-verbal communication between Jackson and Jones in 'The Sunset Limited'. I got to about the place when Jones lies down on a couch when I first tried to watch it, but I was listening to it as well as watching it - didn't like it. Many critics say it isn't McCarthy's best work, and it isn't, it's not as 'open' as his usual stuff, very dry. But this time I watched only the first 6 minutes or so, with the sound down, and Jackson and Jones do something else you can't see with sound. They're fighting, 'White' trying to beat 'Black' up, while 'Black' submitting to draw 'White' into his trap. Even after 6 minutes, Jones (White) has won, and if I watch more, I'll see him slowly beating Jackson up with non-verbal communication until Jackson's sitting there, dumbfounded at the end, 'punch-drunk'. 'Deep' dialogue isn't the winner here, it's the actors performances, they could have almost been speaking about anything, like one's a Pepsi drinker, the other's a Coca-Cola. Coca-Cola wins, of course :-)

Saturday, October 6, 2012

Watch out! Another's on its way!

Yep, that 2nd novelette has started. I was stuck on a few plotholes, but now I've worked it out.
Done over 2000 words, some nice scenes happening.
The 1st novelette...still waiting on that one, don't want to publish until I know.
Didn't win the 6 word story competition. I saw the short list, and only one is good...
Tim Dowling...."Boy meets girl's boyfriend, prefers him."...the rest are just a waste.
http://www.fleetingmagazine.com/six-word-story-competition-shortlist/
My 5 attempts were dreadful, though this one I thought was okay..."Lost her phone, lost her mind."
The November 50,000 words challenge is coming up...getting ready for it.




Wednesday, October 3, 2012

My books are movies

That's about it, really, I guess. My books are movies, movies which will probably never be made :-(
The connection between my TV and DVD player is bad, so I watch everything with a 'green' tint, which is quite special, like everything is Matrix. I think if anyone ever picks up my 3rd book 'Rage' and makes it into a movie, it should be shot with a brilliant 'blue' tint, plus with the odd '300' style slow action scene, all mixed with 'Carry On' silliness, of course.
Nothing much going on, time ticks by, ideas come and go, the literary world goes nuts on pointless twaddle (as it has done for decades now), and I sit and wait for my next story to blossom...