Dani's Shorts 2 downloads so far :-)

It's the end of the Amazon promo for 'Dani's Shorts 2'...not much interest in it, really. Is it because it's me or shorts stories? Anyway, overall, there are now over 100 free copies out there, somewhere, 2 weeks after publishing. It's not much, but hey, who am I to complain?
If you still haven't got it, it's here for free...
http://www.smashwords.com/books/view/409062

Trying to keep up with editing 'How to' and TIW latest stuff. But you know how life is. And I did it again. I was reading 'Manna-X' on the metro and I almost missed my stop. 13 stops is a long time but it seemed only a few minutes. I guess that's yet another reason I write, to read a book I enjoy...I'm really sure that's some kind of 'ego' perversion or something...like Jazz. or do I just 'make a Jazz noise here'...?

For Ukraine - the trouble's just begun

I get a lot of hits from Ukraine, and tons of followers on twitter. I have no idea why, but that's okay :-)
I'm trying to keep up with the Ukraine situation, it's getting dangerous, perhaps I'll write a story about it. Let's see if I understand so far...
Ukraine left the USSR I'm guessing in 1991. Recently, there were talks about Ukraine working with the EU. Unfortunately, Russia wanted Ukraine to join some regional customs union and offered Ukraine financial support to change their minds. The Ukrainian PM finally subdued to Russian pressure (somehow - back hander?) and agreed not to work with the EU. Then the people demonstrated, 80 people were killed by the Police, the Ukrainian PM left. Ukraine set up a temporary Government to sort out the troubles and riots.
However, in Crimea (an autonomous republic of Ukraine with its own parliament and with 60% of the population Russian speakers) a group of masked gunmen held the Crimean Council at gunpoint and forced them to appoint a pro-Russian Chairman, who then appealed for Russian troops to enter the area. 15,000 troops later, Obama and Putin had a telephone conversation, with Putin saying it was his right to protect Russian speakers (there has been no violence against them) and Obama saying they'll take action if Russia doesn't move out (close Putin's personal bank accounts - which are reported to be substantial).
Got it so far?


Now let's translate that into Ukrainian using Google...:-)

 Я отримую багато звернень з України , а також безліч послідовників на Твіттері . Я поняття не маю , чому, але це нормально :-)Я намагаюся не відставати від ситуації в Україні , це стає небезпечним , може бути , я напишу історію про нього. Давайте подивимося , якщо я розумію , досі ...Україна залишив СРСР я припускаю , в 1991 році. Останнім часом були розмови про Україну співпрацює з ЄС. На жаль , Росія хотіла , щоб Україна приєднатися до деяких регіонального митного союзу і запропонував Україні фінансову підтримку , щоб змінити свою думку. Глава українського нарешті підкорив російському тиску (так чи інакше - ? Назад правша ) , і вирішив не працювати з ЄС. Тоді люди продемонстрували , 80 осіб було вбито поліцією , українська PM залишилося. Україна створила тимчасовий уряд , щоб розібратися в неприємності і заворушення .Проте , в Криму ( автономна республіка у складі України зі своїм власним парламентом і з 60 % населення російськомовних ) група озброєних людей в масках провели Кримський Рада під дулом пістолета і змусили їх призначити проросійську голови , який потім звернувся за російські війська , щоб увійти в зону. 15000 війська потому, Обама і Путін провів телефонну розмову з Путіним кажучи , що це було його право на захист російськомовних (не було ніякого насильства проти них ) і Обама кажучи , що вони будуть вживати заходів , якщо Росія не вийти ( близько Путіна особисті банківські рахунки - який , як повідомляється , бути істотним ) .Отримав його досі ?

Happy Birthday, Dr. Seuss!

Yes, it's March the 2nd...Happy Birthday, Dr. Seuss!
My parents must've read me a few when I was very young because I've ALWAYS loved Dr. Seuss, and it must've been VERY young because the first I can remember is the pictures. I was a 'good' drawer at age 9 and I wanted to draw like someone but couldn't remember until I met Dr. Seuss' books later on in life...opportunity gone. I have a small collection of books now which I read to my kids at bedtime. They love them.
But now, yes, you guessed it, to celebrate his birthday, Michael from TIW challenged us to write in the style of Dr. Seuss! So I did. And pasted a picture together...copyright infringement, here I come :-) Find it on TIW here (http://theironwriter.com/challenges/dr-seuss-challenge/)...but here's mine, based on 'One fish, two fish' :-)

One moose, two moose, fat moose, thin moose.

Some are very small, while others seem quite tall. Oh, let's have a ball!

Some are old, and some are bold. Some have colds and some have mould.

Why do some have colds and mould? I guess it won't be told.

Some are happy, some are snappy. This one has a little nappy.

Here are some who like to chat, here are some who like big hats.

Here are some who like to scat, here are some who have pet rats.

Some have great clothes, others have big toes.

Some like to compose, others, well, who knows?

Some are funny, some have money, some like little furry bunnies.

Some have short tails, some have long nails, some like swimming with the blue whales.

This one's name is Tom, he loves to take his Mom to go and see the Prom.

This one's name is Fred, he loves his comfy bed to rest his weary head.

Why does Fred love his bed? I guess because it's cherry red.

None of them is like the other, they all grew up with diff'rent mothers.

So come along and see the moose, but don't forget the orange juice.

Dani's Shorts 2 FREE on Amazon (4 days)

'Dani's Shorts 2' is now available on Amazon for FREE for 4 days! I just want to see if putting it out there will get people to look at it. Here is the link. Share it around, it might help. Perhaps even put on a review!
http://www.amazon.com/Danis-Shorts-2-Dani-Caile-ebook/dp/B00IHYKKG0
UPDATE: After a dozen downloads, It's already at #8,802...shows you how slow the market really is.

It's been a busy week, writing up Challenge 53, a Dora the Explorer parody, a Dr. Seuss celebration (you can see it on Sunday on TIW) and my TIW birthday celebration story, with 55 elements in 500 words - the post before this one. And I'm at 50% with my first edit of 'How to' :-)
UPDATE: I found an old note about 'How to'...of course! It's about THAT! Why, yes! Must complete it soon :-) Trying...

First Annual 2014 Iron Blog Tour

And here it is, the First Annual 2014 Iron Blog Tour (Day 2...err 3)!
Day 1 (Monday) was Jordan Bell with 'The Price of Ambition' here.
Day 2 (Tuesday) was, well, err...
Day 3 (Wednesday) is..me!

But first, a word from K.A. DaVur, our illustrious leader of this fine Birthday Blog Hop :-)

"Four elements, four days, 500 words. It’s a daunting task, one that will hone the skills of any writer. It is also the premise of The Iron Writer. The Iron Writer Challenge was started one year ago by short fiction author Brian Rogers. Since it’s inception, it has grown incredibly. The site now boasts irons from seven countries and includes not only the original challenge but a non-competitive Weekend Quickie, a relay, and a site where seasoned authors give writing tips and advice. They have a networking page wherein the members share publishing opportunities, freelance work, and more. They also have a NaNoWriMo group that boasted several winners and who join together each year to “kill” the sites founder as part of their novel. The judging has evolved from a public vote to said vote combined with a rigorous judging system in order to combine literary merit with marketing skills to determine which writer has the most “metal in their mettle.” In celebration of the occasion, several Irons have elected to participate in a Birthday Blog Hop. The challenge? To write a commemorative 500 word piece of flash fiction including the following elements: iron, a quill, a birthday cake, and the favorite element from each Iron’s first challenge."

And now, a word from me :-)

To all Iron Writers, I say this to you..."Fellow knights of the Iron Writer's table, while others have appeared like mere flatulence in the wind, it is you who have steered our course true. This story is for you."


****
Waiting for the Equinox

(iron, quill, birthday cake, 1 element from 1st challenge (err...I changed this to using 1 element from all 52 named challenges, written within the story in order, except for Challenge 51 element 'no 'be' verbs' which is used throughout - well, a birthday only happens once a year, so do something special)


"Meteors outside." Tom lay his ruby red slippers over the failed superhero in the elevator and sat down on his favourite coconut opposite the family's 1880 vampire hunting kit.
"Wonderful, dear." His space monkey, Suzie, did her usual chore of cutting quills with her ginsu knives for the pregnant camel next door. They shared a smile and watched the gyroscope in the corner.
"What's on the water buffalo tonight, dear?"
"Same old, same old. Black lipstick, I think," replied Suzie, now jumping on her trampoline. The dead gypsy rested on his theremin, silent.
"Anything special for dinner?" Tom hung on the clothes line and took a bag of almonds from his own personal group of reference librarians he kept in a casket. Satisfied that the flashing neon lights on the ceiling had stopped due to the malfunctioning pole mounted electric transformer, he waved his semaphore flags and watched his pet trilobite crawl across the floor.
"Just the usual, dear. Birthday cake." Suzie paused in her jumping and tore the hand held lawn clippers from her thigh, replacing them with chopsticks. Tom banged on his 1951 Kaiser Drag'n and yodelled like Slim Whitman.
"Again? Why can't we have something else for a change! Like fried green tomatoes or banana slippers! Why do we always eat birthday cake?"
Suzie whipped her husband with a feather boa, knowing he'd love it.
"Did you have a bad day? Another fight with the live Griffin, dear? Would you like a cup of tea?"
"Oh, yes. Thank you, darling."
Suzie disappeared into their abandoned outhouse to make tea and look for the jar of bacon fat Tom so often admired. A particularly interesting dressed herring appeared on the buffalo's hind and caught Tom's attention.
"Suzie, quick! You've gotta see this!"
She came running in wearing a pair of fishnet stockings and a wooden hanger stuck on the back of her neck. They both lost interest as the Bionic Woman sailed by in a Roman merchant sailing vessel. Suzie sighed, ate the 2000 year old map of the Earth she'd saved for later and went back to making tea.
"Anything happen today, dear?" asked Tom, now fixing his motherboard with the aid of a voodoo witch doctor.
"No, dear." By the time Tom had finished saying 'supercalifragilisticexpialidocious', Suzie'd brought in his cup of tea and sewed it with needle and thread to the bug zapper on the side of Tom's coconut.
"Oh, I almost forgot, my latest victim." Braving the haboob trapped within his James Bond Mini Spy Kit he'd taken to work, Tom lifted out an iron ingot, shiny and wet. "Look what I found inside a toilet roll hat."
"Oh, what a muppet! And so cute!" She stroked its back and tickled its tummy.
"Some Harpy tried to drown it in the river. Good job I had my lucky Kiwi bird on me."
"Can we...keep it?" Suzie flashed her nostrils at Tom, knowing his weakness.
"Well...okay."
Suzie laughed and punched him out.
"Thank you, darling!"

****

Visit Mamie Willoughby Pound at  www.happyeverywhere.com tomorrow for Day 4 to read their take on the elements, and don’t forget to visit www.theironwriter.com to read some amazing flash fiction or, if you think you have what it takes, sign up for a challenge :-)

Day 1 of TIW 1st Annual Blog Tour

Day 1 of the Iron Writer Blog Hop Celebration (First Annual 2014 Iron Blog Tour) with Jordan Bell in the writing seat. It's a great story, you should go and have a look, it's one of his best.
http://jbfiction.blogspot.hu/2014/02/i-am-kicking-off-blog-tour-lets-go.html
Mine will be on Thursday.
Reading 'Flowers for Algeron'...yes, I've never read it, I'm not American. It's entertaining, has good points, bad points, but considering it was written in 1955 it's fantastic! It's a shame society hasn't caught up with the book. I haven't finished it yet, I wonder what happens...(don't spoil it, I think I know...)

Manna-X on Fatfairyfantastic.com!

Yep, please come and vote for 'Manna-X' :-)
http://www.fatfairyfantastic.com/the-guest-indies/manna-x-by-dani-j-caile/
The more votes, the more chance of the advert staying on and getting its own exclusive page (which it has ATM but who knows for how long :-) The more it stays, the greater the chance of someone seeing it!
Here it is...looks like my name is 'Dain'....