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Tuesday, May 31, 2016

"Attack of the Killer Pogo Sticks"

I entered a short story competition, 'The Writer's Drawer Short Story Contest 2016' (http://www.thewritersdrawer.net/short-story-contest-2016.html)
but I didn't place...BUT I was one of 3 who were 'Highly Recommended', so I came in the Top 6.
"Attack of the Killer Pogo Sticks"...based on 'The Blob'...
Please, go read it, they put it up on their site :-)

http://www.thewritersdrawer.net/killer-pogo-sticks.html



Saturday, May 28, 2016

WQ181 + Updates

The Writers Games 2016 is still on, Event 3 this week. Written and sent.
I didn't get in the top 5 in Event 1, nor the top 3 in Event 2 (I sent a very pc version), though got some feedback from Event 1.
I don't know whether I can reply to the feedback, but I did make at least 2 out of the 3 judges laugh. Isn't that enough?

New novel...40k and rising! The first draft is about 3/4s done, hoping ti finish soon.

But now...Weekend Quickie 181!
Here it is on the website...http://theironwriter.com/the-iron-writer-challenge-weekend-quickie-181
But mine is here, too :-) ..nothing changes, eh? Lol




181 – image above, a dead man, a boy, fear

(The Old Man and the Sea - alternative ending)

Manolin ran as fast as he could through the sand and stones, carrying the fish's head against his chest. He feared he would find a dead man in the shack. If only they would have let him go fishing with the old man, then there would be no marlin on the side of his boat on the beach, eaten by sharks, and perhaps something worse, waiting for him in the darkness of the old man's abode. Footsteps led him to the place, the door ajar. Dreading that final step, he took a deep breath and walked in.
"Old man?"
On the bed lay Santiago, face down, with his left hand dangling to the floor, bloody and cut. Manolin put the marlin's head by the door and stepped closer, hoping the old man was still alive. He vowed that he would never let the old man go fishing alone again, no matter what the others said, especially his father. He was his apprentice and his place was by the old man's side. He touched the old man on the shoulder.
"Old...?"
A long, loud and disgustingly stinky fart came from the old man's worn breeches. He was alive! The boy fainted.
 

Sunday, May 22, 2016

All for Love review + WQ180 + Writers Games 2016 update

I have another review on "All for Love" !! Thank you, Alis! Firstly, for buying a paperback, secondly, for giving a review, and thirdly, for being FANTASTIC! :-)

Format: Paperback Verified Purchase
Original and gripping, and excellently written and plotted. You may not be in love with some of the characters by the end, but you love the journey they took you on. Highly recommend. 
If you'd like to read it, here it is...(the link, that is)

New book first draft...30k and rising...

Winter Games 2016 update...Event 2 is on....re-written three times and resent it...in Event 1, I wasn't in the Top 5...but soon we will get some feedback and after Event 3, we will know where we 'place'. So, who knows.

And here's Iron Writer Weekend Quickie 180!
See it here on the website...http://theironwriter.com/the-iron-writer-challenge-weekend-quickie-180/#comment-256361
Or here below...





180 – image cropped from “Christ among Scribes” (Ribera) - above, determination, internet service, a social event

Richard moved through the crowd with some determination. There were at least six of them at it, trying to get a presentation to work, and the families at the wedding were beginning to get restless, waiting for more than an hour. Drinks were flowing and voices grew louder.
"Excuse me," said Richard.
"Look," said the Best Man to another suit. "We've got internet service through the Wifi, it's running through my SkyDrive and working on the computer, it's just not showing up on the projector's screen."
"Is this laptop compatible with this projector?" asked another technical wizard.
"Excuse me," said Richard.
"Yes, I used this same setup last year at your Auntie's funeral," replied the Best Man.
"Perhaps if we try rebooting the laptop, the projector will recognize it and..." said another.
"Don't you think I've tried that?"
"Excuse me!" said Richard.
"Why are we waiting!" shouted one drunk relative. Other joined in.
"Excuse me!" said Richard.
"What?" shouted back the Best Man.
"I think I know why it's not working," said Richard.
The Best Man snorted. "What would you know? You're a gardener!"
Richard walked up to the projector sitting on the table and took off the lens cap.


Saturday, May 14, 2016

WQ179 and the Writers Games 2016

Entered my first story for the Writers Games 2016...unfortunately, due to the rules, I can't show it until the tournament is over (unless I win one Event and they post it themselves...chance is highly unlikely)
AND it's time for the Iron Writer Weekend Quickie!
Here is the link to the site and other 200 word miracles...
http://theironwriter.com/the-iron-writer-challenge-weekend-quickie-179/
...and here's mine reproduced on this little blog :-)



WQ179 - image above, an old widow, insight, a sleepless night

"Did you hear about ol' Mrs Kompelsmitzen?"
"Isn't that the old widow who lives at No.5?"
"Lived."
"What? Did the old Kraut finally kick the bucket, then?"
"Not for lack of trying. She smoked more than your ol' banger!"
"Watch it, boyo. How old was she?"
"I think someone estimated her age to be around 102, give or take a year."
"Wow. For a smoker, you'd think she'd have gone long ago."
"Tough as old nails. You know, they couldn't prove it, but they said she was a concentration camp guard back in the war."
"What war?"
"THE war, you know, World War Two, Hitler and the Jews and all that?"
"No."
"Did you go to school?"
"No."
"Where did you go?"
"To the pub."
"Right."
"So? The old Kraut?"
"Oh yeah, well apparently after cooking a nice, stinkingly large portion of cabbage and noodles, she got stomach problems. Her neighbours said they could hear her flatulence problems through the walls and listened to her shouting and pacing for hours. They all had a sleepless night."
"So, she died of wind?"
"You could say that. She'd be alive If she'd had the insight to not light her morning cigarette..."

Sunday, May 8, 2016

WQ178 + update

Almost up to 30,000 with the new novel's first draft...but then there's the plot check, storyline, character check, name check, runthrough 2,458...etc
I'm also doing the 2016 Writers Games, 7 weeks with 7 stories...http://www.writersworkout.net/...it was the Practise Event this week. It's rather like the Iron Writer, with set elements, word limit and genre but somehow you are given points from judges...I don't know how it'll work, but will be interesting to see how I do.
Anyway...Iron Writer Weekend Quickie 178 is up!
http://theironwriter.com/the-iron-writer-challenge-weekend-quickie-178/

And here's my take...


WQ178 - image above, time, vanity, juxtaposed

"Your skill of flying helicopters is juxtaposed with your inability to drive a car, Cuthbert," said Lord Farquhar. His butler flew a few feet over the city traffic, missing the jam below.
"I try my best, sir," said Cuthbert the butler. "I do prefer the air. Cars are so 'grounded'."
"Not when you're driving them," said Lord Farquhar. "How are we doing for time?"
"Time, sir, is relative."
"No, Lady Bertwaite is a relative and there'll be hell to pay if I'm late! Oh, the vanity of the woman, to hold a banquet in the city on the top of the most prestigious hotel in rush hour!"
"One minute, sir, and we'll be there. I'm afraid, sir, you may have to use the rope ladder."
"Oh, you scoundrel, Cuthbert. The indignity of it all!"
"Perhaps there is another option, sir. If I can get close enough..." They'd reached the building and Cuthbert took the helicopter to the top. "Sir?"
"Yes?"
"Jump!" He opened the door and pushed Lord Farquhar out, allowing him to roll onto the rooftop and make a dramatic entrance.
"Oh, bravo, Cuthbert, bravo!" Lord Farquhar waved the helicopter away and strolled proudly on through the applauding crowd.

Saturday, April 30, 2016

WQ177 + Book Update

20,000 words plus on the new novel, 'How to 2'...I hope my publisher will take it!

In April, I've been hovering around the 100k Amazon Author Rank...anything from 40k to 150k, actually...it might not seem much, but it is to me! I'm in the Top 100k...at the moment...give it a few days and I'll be back in the 300k...:-(

Dictatorship update...Our Illustrious Leader wants to move the Crown... again! Last time it moved to Parliament...I guess he wanted to try it on every day...this time he wants to move it to a museum for a TON of money, TAXPAYERS' MONEY...I guess he has enough money himself now to put a copy in the museum and keep the real Crown at home...the home he doesn't own, of course.
And that home? And all that land around it? And all that land his friends own? Well, they're building a tourist railway on it, for a TON of money, TAXPAYERS' MONEY. For who? No one goes there!
Oh, and if a journalist asks a question the Government doesn't like, they are banned from Parliament. Freedom of Speech...not happening!
All fun and games here...people say "If you don't like it, get the fuck out!" I believe they are stupid to want to live in a country which the Government is blatantly and transparently robbing them blind, and then tell me I'm the one who should go. This would be such a fantastic place to live if it wasn't for this Dictatorship. "Down with the Dictatorship!" that's what I say. And "Education for the cretins! They also have a right to think!"

So...WQ177! - image below, rhetoric, perspective, sudden stop


(Note: I am offended by those who think the Holocaust never happened. BUT I am also offended by those who make money from trying to portray it, knowing full well that it is 'in fashion' at this moment to write about it, write novels about it and produce movies about it. It happened. Let them rest in peace. Humans are bastards. They will do anything for POWER.)


"It's a matter of perspective, you see," said the Commandant.
"Yes?" said the Commissioner, visiting the camps in the area. They were standing facing a wall of frosted glass. Beyond this barrier could be seen bodies, moving around, mingling.
"Those who find themselves in power will do as has been done before, to hold and increase what they have already gained, oppressing those masses which allow them to do so, and so because of this, those in power understand themselves to be Gods among men and so will act in such a way that they themselves will eventually believe that they are Gods and that nothing will bring them down and..."
"...and that's why you have over two hundred naked people locked in the kitchen?" asked the Commissioner, halting the man's rhetoric.
"Yes. Being naked is of course another form of oppression, destroying their humanity..." The Commandant came to a sudden stop.
"What's the matter, Commandant?"
"I think I left the gas on." A pair of hands hit the frosted glass as people panicked in the kitchen. The hands on the pain slipped down and disappeared, leaving only faint images of lying bodies seen through the glass. "Oops, my bad."




Thursday, April 28, 2016

Transgender Bathroom Law: What?

So I've been sitting on the sidelines, watching law upon law appear in the USA, banning transgenders from using the 'wrong' public bathroom, I guess from fear that they will molest those of the 'opposite' sex, specifically, those born 'men' going into a women's public toilet...mmm...
This week a certain  'non-transgender, hetrosexual former speaker of the U.S. Senate' was sentenced to prison for child molestation...
http://www.dallasvoice.com/non-trans-speaker-house-sentenced-child-molestation-10218550.html

...so that's where they're coming from. Those politicians creating these laws are all PERVERTS or have some kind of sexual molestation on their mind. Maybe it comes with all that power, seeing as sex IS power.

Now, back to the toilet (flush). I don't know about you, but I go into public toilets to go to the toilet, to relieve myself of waste from food consumption. The only people who go into toilets to MOLEST or RAPE are those who are SICK. So, those politicians who created these laws are SICK because they have it on their mind that people go into toilets to do that, especially people who are transgender who wear the 'wrong' clothes.

Now, let's move onto Transgender people...some would say they're confused...there are a LOT of confused people, and they're not confused, they know what they are. I would say "Hey, be what you want to be, just don't make such a big thing about it and shove it down my throat every two seconds, ya prima donna".

But then, who's making such a big issue out of this, huh? Who? The politicians or the transgenders?