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Sunday, May 4, 2014

When TIW's get together..."The Goatee of Neal"

Every day, something funny happens on TIW facebook page. If I'm lucky, I'm a part of it. Sometimes I miss out, sometimes I instigate. But above all, the TIWs try to have fun.
Today was no different. A respected (as we all are) member of TIW, Neal Sayatovich, decided to change his own facebook profile picture. I won't reproduce the picture here, you can use your large and expansive imaginations...no, hang on, scratch that, here it is, on a post on his blog about this 'happening' (http://nsayatovich.wordpress.com/2014/05/04/making-an-impression/).
Myself and another TIW, Mathew W. Weaver (his wonderful post of the 'event' can be found here...http://ramblingsandraving.blogspot.hu/2014/05/the-tale-of-depressed-goatee-when-tiws.html) took it upon ourselves to show humble respect for the man with the green goatee by posting an impromtu unplanned relay story. I had to share it...so, with permission from both Mathew and Neal, here it is :-) Enjoy! (Numerous friends laughed their guts out).



Dani J Caile
Neal loved his pet beard. It was the most loyal and warm of all his clumps of facial hair, and on cold wet morning walks it would save its master's chin from the perils of the northern winds.
Mathew W. Weaver
The relationship Neal shared with his goatee went beyond that of mere man and beard. It was a bond of unity, of brotherhood, of love beyond measure.
But neither could have seen how this bond was to be put to the test, when that fateful morning, Neal looked into the mirror to see the newly growing sproutlings of a pair of sideburns.
Dani J Caile
And there the dilemma began, a rivalry never seen before on the face of Neal. At first the sideburns were mere ornaments, emphasizing the manly contours of his broad face, but then they grew, unabated until they too became a major feature on Neal's facebook profile picture.
Mathew W. Weaver
Goatee began to feel it was being left out. All the facebook selfies Neal took now displayed the unabashed glory of those chunky sideburns... and yet never failed to heartlessly crop out the lower half of Goatee's dwindling majesty.
Dani J Caile
For a while, all was calm, one existing without the other, each reigning over their own territories of their master's domain, basking in their own prickily existence, until that one fateful day when their hairs intwined...
Mathew W. Weaver
 ...the day when Neal, while stroking Goatee, reached up and began to stroke The Sideburns as well. To Goatee, the abandonment was raw, undefinable. That its strokes were being usurped by stubble of much lower birth....
Dani J Caile
...and higher altitude. Goatee had no other choice but to summon the help of his dear old friend and patriot, Comb, to suppress and push down The Sideburns' audacity!
Mathew W. Weaver
But Comb, though literally a lifelong friend to Goatee, would not take its side. As despair, dismay and hurt grew, Goatee began to lose weight. It would wake up every morning feeling more brittle than the day before, and grew paler as the days passed.
Dani J Caile
It wasn't long before Goatee, once filled with life and vigor hitherto seen upon Neal's face, lost all hope and sadly turned into the bedraggled green mass of facial bristles that can now be witnessed on facebook.
Mathew W. Weaver
Remorse overcame The Sideburns. They never meant for Goatee to lose its lustre, shed its shine, turn into the patch of fungus that it resembled now. For the sake of Goatee, their stricken brethren, they decided to let go of life, to moult away and leave Neal's cheeks as soft and as baby's bottom smooth as it had been before the troubles began.

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