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Monday, July 7, 2014

TIW Ch 72 take..."Team Building"

If you STILL haven't voted for me in Challenge 71, please do :-) It's a cracker!

And while you're looking, go see my Weekend Quickie 43, it's a nice one....

AND here's my take of the next challenge :-)
This is a challenge put together by Michael Pitman :-) Good on ya, Mike!

Challenge 72 - "Team Building"

(4 elements - Repeated unsuccessful attempts at starting a campfire/fireplace fire, favorite childhood memory that actually is a lie, funeral of a stranger, sign "fail")

"This is the last time I go on one of those team building weekends," moaned Shaun.
"But you're the organiser!" screamed Karen, right into his face. He cowered into a ball and hid in the trees around the clearing.
"Bob, haven't you got that fire ready yet?" asked Dave, Shaun's second-in-charge.
"No. I'm an accountant, not a woodsman. You try."
"Me? I've never made a fire in my life. Never even got a scout badge."
"What?" Tracy started up on Dave. "Five days we've been going around in these woods, first we've gotta deal with this 'jellyfish'…"
"Easy now, Shaun's had a bad time of it lately, what with his wife leaving and her taking custody of the dog…"
"Who gives a shit about the dog! Look! Look at that!" Karen pushed Dave over to the other side of the clearing, where the slowly rotting corpse of their fellow team builder 'whatsisname' lay. "I think there are bigger things to worry about than a bloody dog!"
"Well, he shouldn't've touched that sign."
"What, the sign that said "Caution, this sign has sharp edges". What kind of sign is that?" yelled Tracy.
"Let's just settle down, alright?" Keith was the quiet, calm type. "I thought we already came to the decision. We give…whatsisname…a funeral befitting a viking warrior…"
"Without the boat," mentioned Bob, still blowing on the smoke, trying to get the fire going and needing to relight it with yet another match from their dwindling supply.
"Yes, thank you, Bob. Light the fire, okay?" Keith dragged the body of 'whatsisname' closer to the large pile of unlit wood. "Does anyone know his name?"
"Dave?" threatened Karen.
"Err, no. Shaun thought we'd leave the list of names at basecamp, to make it a more 'connecting' team building exercise, no one knowing who is who, everyone getting together…"
"His throat was cut in the first two hours! We never got a chance to know him or even speak to him!"
"Hey! It's…no, it isn't." Bob took out another match. They all sat down and tried not to smell the body.
"Why didn't we turn back right then?" asked Keith.
"Err, we did. Then we got lost," confessed Dave.
"What a complete balls-up."
"Hey, I remember a fantastic time, lost in the woods when I was a kid," laughed Dave.
"Yes, really? Seeing as you are now here, you found your way out," replied Bob, blowing.
"It was great! We had no food…"
"Like now."
"… it poured down for days…"
"Like now."
"…and we had no map and no way to find our way home."
"Like now. So, what happened?"
"Err, erm…"
"That was a lie, wasn't it? You didn't get lost in the woods, did you?" growled Karen.
"Err, no. No, we didn't."
"Tesco's. It was Tesco's."
Karen grabbed a large stick from the unlit fire and whacked it around his head.
"Now then, that's enough of that!"
They all sat down again in silence.
"Hey! I've got it…nope."

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