Latvia and the Ukraine

Okay, so, who is reading this blog from Latvia and the Ukraine? Please get in contact with me and I'll send you a book. Go to...
http://www.djc.yolasite.com/contact-dani-j-caile.php
Jottify is doing a competition which is 'right down my street'...but I've got no ideas for an 800 word story....there's still some time...maybe I cantake a scene from 'MBAT' and adapt it...yes, that's what I'll do...

The Sunset Limited

Been analysing the non-verbal communication between Jackson and Jones in 'The Sunset Limited'. I got to about the place when Jones lies down on a couch when I first tried to watch it, but I was listening to it as well as watching it - didn't like it. Many critics say it isn't McCarthy's best work, and it isn't, it's not as 'open' as his usual stuff, very dry. But this time I watched only the first 6 minutes or so, with the sound down, and Jackson and Jones do something else you can't see with sound. They're fighting, 'White' trying to beat 'Black' up, while 'Black' submitting to draw 'White' into his trap. Even after 6 minutes, Jones (White) has won, and if I watch more, I'll see him slowly beating Jackson up with non-verbal communication until Jackson's sitting there, dumbfounded at the end, 'punch-drunk'. 'Deep' dialogue isn't the winner here, it's the actors performances, they could have almost been speaking about anything, like one's a Pepsi drinker, the other's a Coca-Cola. Coca-Cola wins, of course :-)

Watch out! Another's on its way!

Yep, that 2nd novelette has started. I was stuck on a few plotholes, but now I've worked it out.
Done over 2000 words, some nice scenes happening.
The 1st novelette...still waiting on that one, don't want to publish until I know.
Didn't win the 6 word story competition. I saw the short list, and only one is good...
Tim Dowling...."Boy meets girl's boyfriend, prefers him."...the rest are just a waste.
http://www.fleetingmagazine.com/six-word-story-competition-shortlist/
My 5 attempts were dreadful, though this one I thought was okay..."Lost her phone, lost her mind."
The November 50,000 words challenge is coming up...getting ready for it.

My books are movies

That's about it, really, I guess. My books are movies, movies which will probably never be made :-(
The connection between my TV and DVD player is bad, so I watch everything with a 'green' tint, which is quite special, like everything is Matrix. I think if anyone ever picks up my 3rd book 'Rage' and makes it into a movie, it should be shot with a brilliant 'blue' tint, plus with the odd '300' style slow action scene, all mixed with 'Carry On' silliness, of course.
Nothing much going on, time ticks by, ideas come and go, the literary world goes nuts on pointless twaddle (as it has done for decades now), and I sit and wait for my next story to blossom...

Amazon Ranked!

Wow, I have 'rank's on Amazon. They're very very low, of course, but I have some :-)
'Man by a tree' (now only £5.36) Bestsellers Rank: 2,196,049
'The Bethlehem Fiasco' (now only £6.08) Bestsellers Rank: 3,034,912
'The Rage of Atlantis' (now only £6.75) Bestsellers Rank: 2,992,519
What surprises me is the 3rd has overtaken the 2nd. Is there something wrong with 'Jesus' books? Especially comedy?

So busy...201st post...

Update:
...still working on 'How to'...:'Dani's Shorts 2' coming soon...


Right at this moment in time, I'm completely up to my eyeballs. So many essays to write, so much work to proofread...but I shouldn't complain. My books are out there, I'm still getting ideas for my October short story, waiting on any news about my novelette in the competition (yeah, right), and now over 2500 views for a 200 post blog all across the globe. Also waiting for a few more reviews of my 3rd book, 'Rage' here.
...and also more downloads of my little FREE ebook here :-) https://www.smashwords.com/books/view/273975

by the way...
Update: This post is getting a HUGE amount of hits!
Okay, as of 22 Sept 2013...
'Dani's Shorts' and 'TDX2' are still available FREE here...
https://www.smashwords.com/books/byseries/2766
All my other books are on Amazon :-)
http://www.amazon.com/Dani-J-Caile/e/B00CDX0HSM
Please review wherever you can :-)...

200th Post!

Yes, it's my 200th post, and we'Re getting to 2500 views :-)
Just re-submitted 'Rage', it'll be unavailable for less than a day (not that anything's happening). Found a few embarassing typos, so I had to change them.
Working on novelette number 2...good bit about 'how to drive a car' in there, a dig at those drivers I see on the roads every day. Yes, another comedy. What did you expect? A romance? Now there's an idea...

Igen, ez az én 200. post, és egyre we'Re 2500 megtekintés :-)
Csak újra benyújtott "Rage", hogy lesz elérhető kevesebb, mint egy nap (nem, hogy bármi történik). Talált egy pár kínos helyesírási, így meg kellett változtatni őket.
Dolgozik a kisregény száma 2 ... jó kicsit ", hogyan kell vezetni egy autót" ott, a dig azokon járművezetők látom az utakon minden nap. Igen, egy másik vígjáték. Mit vártál? A románc? Most már van egy ötletem ...

Да, это моя двухсотая пост, и we'Re получать до 2500 просмотров :-)
Просто повторно представить 'Rage', это будет недоступно менее чем за день (не происходит, что все, о). Найдено несколько неловко опечаток, так что мне пришлось их менять.
Работа на повесть номер 2 ... немного о хорошем ", как водить машину" там, копать на тех водителей, я вижу на дорогах каждый день. Да, еще комедию. Что вы ожидаете?Романтика? Теперь есть идея ...

 

More reviews for 'Rage' (3rd book)

Yes, there are still some people who haven't read the first chapters of my 3rd book 'Rage'...
Here are a few more bits of reviews :-)

I'm usually not a fan of this kind of writing, but I must admit you've got funny moments, e.g. the strange title on the book in chapter 1, the daily life of God in chapter two, and the 'could watch a dog grow' in chapter 3 (the chapters were so short that I read three of them). So congratulations - you made me laugh!
I couldn't really find any technical errors other than some commas out of place, and that's easily fixed.
I liked that the chapters were so short, cause it made me continue. All the other chapters on this side are so freakishly long that I eventually just skim through them to get to the point, so well done with that, haha!
Keep up the good work!

Anybody who likes Douglas Adams or Terry Pratchett (and there are a lot of them around) will love this book. I actually read three chapters as they are so short...

I liked the humour – the ‘comfy fluffy slippers’ and the squirrels...

A few silly riddles+ writing again 2

I re-visited jottify.com after a few months out, there wasn't much happening, except the usual guys writing the usual stuff. I added a few silly riddles I write way back in early 2011 before I wrote my books.
If you want to see them on the website to help my views, here are the links...
http://jottify.com/works/there-once-was-an-old-boy-named-dale/
http://jottify.com/works/annas-pussy/
Yep, I'm writing another novelette ATM for a competition in October. I should be able to finish it before the end of that month. It's about a fallen angel who's lost his memory and all the monkeys think he's lost his mind, until he realises he's been receiving emergency calls from another angel. He helps him escape, but the ending isn't all so rosy...

Writing again...

Although I have a million things to do, I've started writing again. A little seed of a story is growing in my head. It's so small, I have no detailed idea where it'll go. I have a general idea, but I think it'll be similar to the new novelette in terms of POV, but maybe 2 rather than 1, with the 2 main characters' thinking. Hobgoblins, of course, and a few angels.
Watch this space...(as you do, something might happen sometime, there's always a chance...)

My preference...

I've had to read a few short stories for a course recently, some classics from Woolf, Forster and DH Lawrence. All three were fantastic, though a acquaintence said otherwise (of course).
Woolf's 'The Mark on the Wall' is so good...but not my preference. I found it way too 'greasy', if I had written something in that style...I did, many years ago, and I deleted it. I couldn't read it, I couldn't 'see' myself in it. Woolf is damn good, though.
EM Forster's 'Road from Colonus', now there's a great thing. Still, not my preference, a little too 'smooth', but fantastic back story of Greek tragedy gone wrong due to non-awareness of others.
Now, DH Lawrence 'The Rocking-Horse Winner'...much more my thing in terms of style, though it felt quite dated with the language, and so so predictable. Terrible endline, too, but a great story of a well-to-do family living on hard times.
So, my preference? I read a few chapters of my 3rd book after reading these. Isn't it great when you like your own stuff? Sometimes I think where did it all come from? How did I do that? And my new novelette...still waiting on some 'reaction' from the competition. Probably nothing - who goes for comedy fantasy?
Of course, my writing style is NOTHING compared to these GIANTS in literature, but this shows I'm such a fussy reader. I bow to their memory.

Surfing, a few surprises

Well, I went surfing, and I found myself on...
WritersNet
Moly (Bethlehem Fiasco)
And here, they've used a quote from my 2nd book 'The Bethlehem Fiasco', to head the page!
"Is there a right end of a camel for your head to be in?"
I think that's amazing. There are some really nice pictures of camels too :-)

Guide to 'Rage' 5 - Euristhos, Euryales and Iolus

Japan and Sri Lanka, Hello! Japan is definitely a new hit :-)
Euristhos, Euryales and Iolus - the fallguys.
There has to be someone to do the dirty work, there has to be someone who you can rely on to be stupid.
Iolus is the boss, he gets his orders from Plagamus and does as he's told, hoping in the end for some glory and profit.
Euristhos and Euryales are the stupid twins. Euryalesis the stupidest, there's even a scene where his head is so empty that the music from his walkman is louder in a room when he's wearing it...the empty space amplifies the sound.
In 'Man by a tree', it was the two following hobgoblins, Sniff and Grint. In 'Bethlehem Fiasco', it was the three thieves, and in 'Rage of Atlantis', it's these guys. Read what happens to them, they are a core to the whole action....they ARE the action.

Guide to 'Rage' 4 - Kang Dee

Kang Dee is the sole 'alien' in the Atlantean society who has some power, due to her ancestral right of command over the Letherians (huge monsters of the sea). Her race, the dolphins, represent every type of prejudiced group which ever existed: skin colour, cultural difference, disability. Saying this, it is the dolphin race who not only holds the answer to humanity's problem (the lack of intelligence in human DNA) but they also survive the 'rage' of God to de-evolve into the lovable rogues we know today. I could go on about prejudice, etc. but hey, it's late.
It's really surprising who reads this blog. Not much interest, but what there is, is spread right across the globe :-) Thanks.
If you can, get a hold of 'Rage of Atlantis', you just might like it.

Guide to 'Rage' 3 - Oediouspelus + Plagamus

Oediouspelus and Plagamus are a mix of many politicians. There are two main figures for each, though they are also parts of others, too.
(I've had to censor this post, as all stories are fiction and not based on real people or events, etc. :-) Yeah, right.
Oediouspelus...
First and foremost, Oediouspelus is ......, a Prime Minister and a 'man of the people'. He is the only PM in .......... history who uses informal speech. He also treats his citizens like goldfish with short attention spans, and for his followers, he's not far off. For example, only a week ago, he blamed the EU for getting us in this needed huge loan mess with the IMF. What he forgot to say was that he was the one who got his country into the bad situation with the EU in the first place, therefore losing all financial backing from the EU, and getting the country into deep shit with the IMF.
Secondly, Oediouspelus is ..........., the man who walked away from a very stinky historical event. His father was not only President, but also Head of 'a special operations force'. And he always had his hands in the oil business. Something went on there, I'm telling ya. And he walks away a 'hero'. Are people dumb or what?
Plagamus...
Firstly, Plagamus is ............, ex-President, accused of genocide in a war. Trials are still ongoing for some former leaders.
Secondly, Plagamus is ........., a resigned President. The reason he resigned? It was found that his dissertation was in fact a 100% word-for-word translated copy of a dissertation by someone else. So, after receiving his degree, he had 20 years of rising up in the ranks of sports committees and politics, all based on a lie.
In my book 'Rage' Oediouspelus and Plagamus make a deal with Satan for immortality, something he can't actually give...

Brave New World (Aldous Huxley)

Have to read Brave New World for about the fifth time in my life, which is not a bad thing, and I realised that there are HUGE similarities between this fantastic piece of writing and my 3rd effort 'Rage of Atlantis'. The only difference (other than in writing proficiency) is that Huxley set his Utopia criticising the present in the future, and I sent it right back to the beginning of humanity. I'm quite happy I have a book like this. If you're going to 'copy' an idea, choose a great book to do it with. It wasn't planned, I just thought that it was the best way to criticise the things that have happened in our society in the last decade/year, things that people just take for granted, terror, prejudice, progress.
So, comparisons can be made. Of course, Huxley's in another class.

Guide to 'Rage' 2 - Population Project Centre

Second part...the Population Project Centre...very similar to Aldous Huxley's 'Brave New World', really. Two Directors, Dreus and Creus, twins from the same tube, are in charge of keeping control of the population growth, and in which way it should continue in the future. Plagamus tries every year to enter the 'Project', but his DNA 'score' is the lowest on record. Dreus and Creus come from a long line of Directors/Scientists who know the ultimate truth - that there is a power higher than humanity, living in a place different to physical reality. These Directors have the responsibility of keeping the population's DNA 'good' for the vehicles used by the souls for the experience of physical reality. They also know that dolpin DNA was mixed with 'monkey' DNA millions of years ago to keep the intelligence within the human race, as it was almost bred out by those monkeys who thought beauty, selfishness, strength and being No.1 were the only things needed to live. I could go on...they 'grow' humans in the Population Project Centre according to instructions from 'above'.

Guide to 'Rage' 1 - the Auditor

Think I'll start a guide to 'Rage'. I've started reading it again and it's FULL of interesting ideas, NEW concepts and strange characters.
The Auditor - before the time of Graham the Grim Reaper, there was a more simple system in place, where Gabriel the angel took souls, and Satan's little hobgoblins took what he didn't. The Auditor was a 'book-keeper' for the Overlords, to check on profit levels. The Auditor was also available to both 'sides' to check on progress. Satan took him in, befriended him, and so the Auditor helped Satan do as he wished. Sadly, all things must come to an end, and so...well, Graham takes over some million or so years later, when the system gets back on its feet.

'Rage of Atlantis' price down!!!

Yes, I did it, I put the price down for ya! Give it a few days to work through. Any takers?
'The Rage of Atlantis' - probably the funniest and deeply disturbed book you'll ever read!

$7.99 - my own createspace website (I get more royalty here)

$7.99 - Amazon.com

£7.50 - Amazon.co.uk (special offer ATM £7.19)


€8.00 - Amazon Europe (this link is to Germany)

 

Price going down...

Yes, I'll put the price down on my 3rd book soon. Though because it's almost 300 pages, the price can't go down too far. I can give discount codes if people buy it through my createspace websites, but because of Amazon, the price stays a little high.
Still getting good reviews / comments on this 3rd books. And waiting for any competition news...could be waiting forever....
Had a fantastic idea for another short novelette, a 'rescue mission' type thing. Will work on it...probably publish a few together.

And another great comment for 'Rage'

They keep coming...this one from someone in authonomy.com who's already met my writing in 'Bethlehem Fiasco'.

I came in to this read with certain expectations - and I was not disappointed. Despite the fact that poor Telausis meets a sticky end, speared and blown to bits, your quirky storyline immediately captivates the attention, and the sardonic humour absolutely shines, just as in The Bethlehem Fiasco. It is done with such a light but deft touch, so that the prose just races along and carries us with it, without the humour ever feeling forced.
For example, from the use of Ivor Tickonme and Arthur Greenwire just after we are told of the bomb, to ‘shuffling in fluffy slippers’ - you take us from the sublime to the ridiculous quite effortlessly, and it’s just lovely. And then we get to meet god, his assistant and his morning coffee in chp 2 - just as I’d hoped and expected. There was no way that I was not going to read on to chp 3, and again, I’m glad I did, because now I can’t wait to find out how Sipho and Kang Dee are going to deal with the threat from the unseen enemy.
Your writing is accomplished, fresh, and highly entertaining.

Interview still online...!

Yes, it's still there.
http://sargakonyv.wordpress.com/2012/05/19/interview-with-dani-j-caile/
If only I could answer those questions again...or have another interview....or get a review in a well-known magazine or something! I have Amazon reviews, Goodreads reviews, and tons of authonomy and YouWriteOn comments, but still waiting for the big time to happen....

It's amazing...

It's amazing where this blog gets hits. I thought Brazil was a good one, but this week Vietnam popped up again, then Moldova (where?), and Morrocco, Venezuela, and even Belgium (if I dare mention the rudest word in the universe). Actually, I read that Adams used that word in the American edition of HHGTHG because the publisher didn't like the original word in the English edition, which was of course the 'f' word.
So I have no idea how people find this blog, but it's nice they do :-)
Ideas on new short stories based on the 'loose end' hobgoblins in the 1st two books. Entering another competition...

Another review of 'Rage' (3rd book)

They just keep coming :-) This one is again from authonomy.com. I'm in a 'read sharing' thread, but I'm too busy to stay on it, so I think this'll be the last review I'll get.
Here are my short and long pitches...

Bombs, angels, dolphins, hobgoblins, crazy monkeys, God in a rage, Satan on the toilet...all mixed with absurdly serious issues.

 

Will a selfish plan for immortality destroy the human race? Or will there be light ‘beyond’ the end of the tunnel?
High Chief of Security Sipho, with his female dolphin sidekick Kang Dee, investigates the latest in a long line of terrorist attacks by the ‘unseen’ against Atlantis, the utopian gem of the physical universe, and finds more than he could have ever imagined.


'The Rage of Atlantis'
I like your short pitch. I’m not usually keen on the “list of things in the book” variety but that’s such a good list that I’ll make an exception.
I like the long pitch too. It’s quirky and interesting - much better than giving me the whole plot.
I really like the opening. A chase is relatively common, but not one in comfy slippers.
... That’s an exceptional first couple of sentences in Ch 2. They’ve got everything - it’s funny and surprising. The red squirrel stuff is really funny too.
“I’m so tired I could watch a dog grow.” is beautiful and ridiculous. I love it....
 After just three short chapters, I wouldn’t expect to entirely understand what’s going on in a fantasy world, and I don’t. But I do see that this is fabulous writing - funny, likeable and unexpected.

"Hair" ain't where it's at! RANT

"That's about us, isn't it?"
Probably the greatest quote yet, from an acquaintance.
All my books are about 'us'. We are continuing the mistakes of our forefathers, we know no different. There is nothing left for us to do...yeah, right. There have been many civilisations and societies since our race dominated this spherical lump of dust and gas. Maybe that's the point, our race doesn't see the 'big' picture, lost in their lives perpetually repeating all around them. We can stop this. Read my books. Understand that this is not IT. As Zappa said "Hair ain't where it's at!" He wasn't talking about 'hair', well, maybe he was, but the point is this isn't it. We can be better than just selfish little monkeys hurting/killing each other to be best. There is no best, there is no worst, there is no anything. We are on a lump of matter orbiting an energy source in an infinite space/time. We are lucky to be here. We should do something about it. We should help each other. We should stop pissing around with religion, politics, war, money, and feel our responsibilities towards each other instead of trying to rip each other off, which is what we are all doing. Take a stand, be responsible for yourself and the environment around you. And while you're at it, read my books :-)

Entering Competitions again

Well, it's a new month, and I can try a few more competitions again. In August, I entered a 1000 word competition, didn't win, but I read the winner. The biggest piece of .... I've ever read. I think I'll do a parody on a winner and send it in. Honestly, it was bad, so bad. I had to go and read some good books afterwards, to make sure I wasn't affected by it. Uggh. Bit of a slow week...other than the sales :-)

Nos, ez egy újabb hónap, és én is megpróbál egy pár versenyen újra. Augusztusban, beléptem egy 1000 szót versenyt, nem nyert, de olvastam a győztes. A legnagyobb darab .... , Amit valaha olvastam. Azt hiszem, nem egy paródia a győztes, és küldje be! Őszintén szólva, nem volt rossz, olyan rossz. Kellett mennem, és olvassa el néhány jó könyvet utána, hogy biztos, hogy nem érinti. Uggh. Bit a lassú héten ... más, mint az eladási :-)

Ну, это новый месяц, и я могу попробовать еще несколько конкурсов снова. В августе, я поступил в 1000 слов конкуренции, не выиграл, но я читал победителя. Самый большой кусок .... Я когда-либо читал. Я думаю, что я буду делать пародию на победителя и отправить его дюйма Честно говоря, это было плохо, так плохо. Я должен был пойти и прочитать несколько хороших книг потом, чтобы убедиться, что я не был затронут. Uggh. Немного медленный неделю ... кроме продажи :-)

Eh bien, c'est un nouveau mois, et je peux essayer quelques compétitions plus encore. En Août, je suis entré dans une compétition de 1000 mots, n'a pas gagné, mais j'ai lu le gagnant. Le plus gros morceau de .... J'ai jamais lu. Je pense que je vais faire une parodie sur un gagnant et l'envoyer po Honnêtement, c'était mauvais, si mauvais. J'ai dû aller lire quelques bons livres après, pour m'assurer que je n'étais pas concerné par celle-ci. Uggh. Bit d'une semaine calme ... :-) autre que le chiffre d'affaires 

More good reviews for 'Rage' (Russian+Hungarian)

Here are a few more good reviews of the opening to 'Rage', my 3rd book :-) You see, it's good!!

The writing style is great, different and refreshing. Its written very well and flows nicey with no sign of needing editing.
Dialogue is great too and brings the characters to life.
Its a good opening, dramatic as is the first chapter and the ending. Coudn't wait to see where it was going. 
Enjoyable funny book.

This is a lot of fun. I read the first 3 chapters...The end of the (1st) chapter is brilliant. I love the if you can't run shuffle. I loved ch.2 as well, God's reflections were amusing and pitched just right suggesting human beings are not the masters of creation we like to think we are...Very hitchhiker's guide.


Вот еще несколько хороших отзывов об открытии на "Ярость", моя третья книга :-) Вы видите, это хорошо!

Стиль письма является большой, разный и освежает. Его очень хорошо написана и течет Nicey без признаков необходимости редактирования.
Диалог является слишком большим и приносит персонажей к жизни.
Его хорошее открытие, драматичным, как первая глава и концовка. Coudn't ждать, чтобы увидеть, где он шел.
Приятный смешной книгой.

Это очень весело. Я прочитал первые три главы ... Конец (1) глава является блестящим. Я люблю пустую, если вы не можете запустить. Я любил ч.2, а также, отражение Божьего были забавные и расположились станом правой предполагая, человеческие существа не мастера создания нам нравится думать, что мы ... Руководство Очень Автостопом.

Íme néhány jó kritikákat a nyílás a "Rage", én 3. foglalásra :-) Látod, ez jó!

Az írás stílusa nagy, más és frissítő. A nagyon jól megírt, és folyik Nicey és nincs jele igénylő szerkesztést.
Dialogue nagy is, és hozza a karaktert életre.
Ez egy jó nyitás drámai, mint az első fejezet, és a befejezést. Coudn't várom, hogy lássam, ahol megy.
Élvezetes vicces könyv.

Ez egy nagyon szórakoztató. Olvastam az első három fejezet ... A végén (1.) fejezet zseniális. Szeretem a shuffle, ha nem tud futni. Imádtam ch.2 is, Isten gondolatok voltak, szórakoztató és felverte csak jobbra utal az emberi lények nem urai a teremtés szeretjük azt gondolni, mi vagyunk ... Nagyon útikalauz stopposoknak.

UPDATE: Shakespeare---retold (MidsummerNightsDream)

Yes, crazy, but my workplace wants me to do a play with one of the worst classes in the school (UPDATE: They are one of the BEST classes now, due to this play :-)). I re-wrote Shakespeare's Midsummer Nights Dream just for them....here's an extract...definitely NOT Shaky Baby, but the comedy and farce is still there...
You can read it ALL here...http://djcshakespeare.yolasite.com/

Act 1 Scene 2

(Quince, Snug, Bottom, Flute - beard, Snout, Starveling –long beard over shoulder)

(take chairs and sit in a semi-circle)

Quince

Are we all here?

Bottom

Call out the names.

Quince

The people on this list are the best in all Athens to play before the Duke and Duchess on their wedding day.

Bottom

What is the play?

Quince

A comedy, the death of Pyramus and Thisby.

Bottom

Oh, very good! Please, call out the names and their parts.

Quince

Okay, okay. Nick Bottom, the weaver. You are Pyramus, the lover.

Bottom

Oh goody! I shall move the audience to tears…with tears. (stands up) I will play my part with strength and spirit!

Quince

Yes…(Bottom sits down) Francis Flute, the bellows-maker, you are Thisby.

Flute

Who is Thisby? A wandering knight?

Quince

Pyramus’s lady love.

Flute

But I’ve got a beard! I can’t play a woman.

Quince

Whatever.

Bottom

(stands up) I can play Thisby! I will speak with a little voice, “Oh, Pyramus, my love…”

Quince

No, you play Pyramus, Flute plays Thisby. (Bottom sits down)

Bottom

Okay.

Quince

Robin Starveling, the tailor, you play Thisby’s mother.

Starveling

But I’ve got a longer beard than Flute. (beard off shoulder)

Quince

And? Tom Snout, the tinker, you play Pyramus’s father.

Snout

Okay.

Quince

I myself will play Thisby’s father. Snug?

Snug

Yes?

Quince

You play the lion.

Sung

How many lines has the lion got?

Quince

The lion roars.

Sung

Oh yes, so it does.

Bottom

Let me play the lion! (stands up) I can roar like no other! (roar)

Quince

And you will frighten the Duchess. They would hang us all!

Bottom

I will roar quietly, then.(roar)

Quince

You play Pyramus. Pyramus is the best part.

Bottom

Excellent! Do I need a beard?

Quince

Why not? They have one.

Bottom

(walking away, talking under Quince) 

I will have a long beard, orange and yellow, with purple and blue streaks and…yes…

Quince

There are your parts, learn them well. We meet in the woods tomorrow night.

Bottom

We will meet! Practise, and ’adieu’.

(all wave and leave – take chairs)

Sales are lovely :-) (Russian,German,Hungarian, Australian (kidding))

I love it when I get a sale :-) Not because there's any money in it, because there isn't, especially if someone buys off Amazon, they give so little royalty, it's unbelievable. My CreateSpace sites give me 'some' money, but still not much. No, it's not the money. It's the knowledge that someone else will enter the world of Dani J Caile, or at least attempt to. I haven't had many sales in England, but that's not surprising, my books rip their priorities, their foundations and lifestyle to hell. Only those who see a different view buy my books. Or friends and relatives HA :-)
And when I get more than one sale in the day from the same region, is that 2 or more people, or 1 with a lot of hands who likes to read 2 or more books consecutively? A 3 armed man on the metro intensely reading MBAT, BF and Rage?
Had a great short story spinoff idea about Sniff and Grint from MBAT, might just write it up :-)


Я люблю, когда мне добраться до продажи :-) Не потому, что есть деньги в это, потому что нет, особенно если кто-то покупает от Amazon, роялти Они дают так мало, это невероятно. Мои сайты CreateSpace дать мне «некоторые» деньги, но все же не так много. Нет, это не деньги. Это кто-то знаний боль еще войдет в мире Daniel J Caile или, по крайней мере, попытаться. У меня не так много сил продажам в Англии, но это не удивительно, мои книги сорвать их приоритеты, фонды и их образ жизни в ад. Те, кто видят только другой взгляд купить мои книги. Друзья и родственники или HA :-)
И когда я получаю больше, чем один день от продажи в одном регионе, два или более человек пострадал, или один с большим количеством рук, кто любит читать два или более последовательно книг?3-вооруженный человек на метро чтении интенсивно MBAT, BF и ярость?
Имел отличный короткий идея рассказа о продолжениях от MBAT Sniff и Гринт, может просто написать об этом :-)


Imádom, amikor kapok egy eladó :-) Nem azért, mert van olyan pénz, mert nincs, főleg, ha valaki vásárol ki Amazon, adnak olyan keveset szerzői jogdíj, ez hihetetlen. Erre CreateSpace oldalak adj 'Néhány' pénzt, de még mindig nem sok. Nem, ez nem a pénz. Ez az a tudat, hogy valaki más lép a világ Dani J Caile, vagy legalábbis kísérletet. Még nem volt sok értékesítés Angliában, de ez nem meglepő, a könyveimet rip azok prioritásait, azok az alapítványok és életmód a pokolba. Csak azok, akik a más véleményen vásárolni könyveimet. Vagy barátoktól és rokonoktól HA :-)
És ha még több, mint egy eladó a nappalt az ugyanabban a régióban az, hogy két vagy több ember, vagy egy a sok kéz, aki szeret olvasni két vagy több könyvet egymás után? A három fegyveres férfi a metró intenzív olvasás MBAT, BF és a Rage?
Volt egy nagy elbeszélés spinoff ötlet Sniff és Grint származó MBAT, talán csak írd fel :-)

Ich liebe es, wenn ich einen Verkauf :-) Nicht zu bekommen, weil es kein Geld drin, denn es ist nicht, besonders wenn jemand off Amazon kauft, sie so wenig Lizenzgebühren zu geben, es ist unglaublich. Meine CreateSpace Sites mir "etwas" Geld, aber immer noch nicht viel. Nein, es ist nicht das Geld. Es ist das Wissen, dass jemand anderes die Welt von Dani J Caile geben, oder zumindest versucht. Ich habe nicht viele Verkäufe in England, aber das ist nicht verwunderlich, reißen meine Bücher ihre Prioritäten, ihre Grundlagen und Lifestyle in die Hölle. Nur diejenigen, die eine andere Ansicht kaufe meine Bücher zu sehen. Oder Freunden und Verwandten HA :-)
Und wenn ich mehr als ein Verkauf in den Tag zu kommen aus der gleichen Region, ist, dass zwei oder mehr Personen, oder mit einer Menge Hände, die zwei oder mehr Bücher nacheinander ausgelesen mag? Ein drei bewaffneten Mann auf dem U-Bahn intensiv gelesen MBAT, BF und Rage?
Had a great short story Spinoff Ahnung Sniff und Grint aus MBAT könnten einfach schreiben es :-) 

Blood is life / Кровь есть жизнь.- read my books / читать мои книги

It's all about blood, really. Life. I hated living in England, but I'm British, on paper. The blood flowing through my veins isn't. No, I'm not black or Asian, I'm European. 1st level, British, American. But then, what are they? Britain is a land of invaders, and America is a land of colonists. I actually have British, Scottish, Irish, Slovakian and Czech blood. And if you go further back, you'll probably find Polish and maybe even Hungarian.
In all my 3 books (so far) blood is important. Man by a tree, Graham loses blood everytime he delivers a soul, plus he has 'blood' on the surface (only if you read the end will you know that one). The Bethlehem Fiasco, it's all about Jesus getting some blood from Michael, and then Satan wanting some of Jesus's (read it all, it's a fantastic book). The Rage of Atlantis, blood everywhere, in the library, murders, mixed race DNA, family DNA traces: it's so full of blood it's unbelieveable, and you might not even notice it (read it, it's the BIGGEST big you'll ever read...honest)
Macbeth was all about blood. In fact, most of Shakespeare was about blood. Because blood is life.

Это все о крови, на самом деле. Жизнь. Я ненавижу, живущих в Англии, но я Великобритании, на бумаге.Кровь течет в моих жилах нет. Нет, я не черный или азиатские, европейские я. 1-го уровня, английские, американские. Но тогда, что же они? Великобритания является страной захватчиков, и Америка является страной колонистов. Я на самом деле имеют британские, шотландские, ирландские, чешские и словацкие крови. И если вы идете дальше, вы найдете Наверное, может быть, даже польском и английском языках.

Во всех моих трех книг (пока) крови также важно. Дерево Человек Грэм теряет кровь каждый раз, когда он доставляет душе, плюс у него есть "кровь" на поверхности (только если вы читали конец один будет больно вы знаете).Fiasco Вифлееме, это все о том, чтобы кровь Иисуса, Майкл, и тогда сатана желание некоторых Иисуса (читать все это, это фантастическая книга).Ярость Atlantis, кровь повсюду, в библиотеке, убийства, смешанной расы, ДНК, следы семье ДНК: это так полна крови, это невероятное, и вы можете даже не заметить его (читал, это самая большая большая вы когда-либо читали честно ...)

 

Autobiographical MBAT? Google translated

Somebody asked the obvious: Is 'Man by a tree' autobiographical? Especially Doug.
Yes. Doug's part is a few real experinces fictionally enhanced - fiction must be greater than real life, real life is dull - I didn't say that, I'm just quoting it. A greater writer than myself said that. Graham's part is a 'version' of my life, especially the move from my mother country to my host. I can never go back, it's not the place for me. 

Кто-то спросил очевидное: Является ли "Человек на дереве" автобиографический? Особенно Даг.
Да. Часть Даг находится в нескольких реального впечатления фиктивно усиливается - художественная литература должна быть больше, чем реальная жизнь, реальная жизнь скучна - Я не говорю, что я просто цитируя его.Больше писатель, чем я сказал. Часть Грэма 'версия' в моей жизни, особенно переход от мамы к моей стране пребывания. Я никогда не смогу вернуться, это не место для меня.

Valaki kérdezte a nyilvánvaló: a "Man egy fa" önéletrajzi? Különösen Doug.
Igen. Doug része néhány valódi tapasztalatokat fictionally fokozni - fiction nagyobbnak kell lennie, mint a valós életben, a valós élet unalmas - Azt nem mondtam, hogy én csak idézni azt. A nagyobb író, mint én mondta. Graham részéről egy "változata" az életemben, különösen az áttérés anyám az én fogadó országban. Én soha nem megy vissza, ez nem az a hely számomra.

Jemand fragte das Offensichtliche: Ist 'Mann mit dem Baum "Autobiographische? Besonders Doug.
Ja. Doug Beach ist ein paar echte Erlebnisse fiktiv erweitert - Fiction muss größer sein als das wirkliche Leben, ist das wahre Leben langweilig - ich habe nicht gesagt, weh, ich bin nur zu zitieren. Der Schriftsteller größer als ich das gesagt habe. Graham ist auch Teil des 'Version' meines Lebens, vor allem der Wechsel von meiner Mutter, meinem Gastland. Ich kann nie wieder, es ist nicht der richtige Ort für mich. 

Education + Novelette completed (Eng,Hung,Russian)

Well, finally, after 4 re-writes, it's done and I've entered the big competition. Just a matter of waiting now until December some time to hear something, if anything. It's a nice little story, with a few jokes.
Education - the school year is starting again. And no one really understands what's going on. Politics, that's what. The teachers think they're going to teach, the pupils think they're going to study or sleep. Whatever.
Schools are here to subjugate and separate the future workforce. They have nothing to do with knowledge, education or self-improvement. All you hear are only words from naive / informed civil servants and teachers with wishful thinking.

Nos, végül 4-e után újra írja, ez történt, és én már belépett a nagy versenyt. Csak egy kérdés vár most decemberig egy ideig hallani valamit, ha bármit. Ez egy szép kis történetet, néhány viccet.
Oktatás - A tanév indul újra. És senki nem érti, mi folyik itt. Politika, ez az, ami. A tanárok azt hiszik fogunk tanítani, a diákok azt hiszik fogunk tanulni vagy aludni. Mindegy.
Iskolák vannak itt, hogy leigázza és külön a jövőbeni munkaerő. Nekik semmi közük a tudás, az oktatás vagy önálló javítására. Minden, amit hallani csak szavak naiv / tájékozott köztisztviselők és tanárok vágyálom.

Ну, и наконец, после 4 переписывает, это делается, и я вошел в большой конкуренции. Просто вопрос ожидания теперь до декабря некоторое время, чтобы что-то услышать, если угодно. Это хорошая маленькая история, с несколькими шутками.
Образование - Учебный год начинается снова. И никто не понимает, что происходит. Политика, вот что. Учителя думают, что они собираются учить, ученики думают, что они собираются учиться или спать. Неважно.
Школы здесь, чтобы подчинить и отделить будущей рабочей силы. Они не имеют ничего общего со знаниями, образования и самосовершенствования. Все, что вы слышите, только слова из наивных / обоснованных государственных служащих и учителей желаемое за действительное.

  

Am I a misanthrope? (English, Russian, Hungarian, Dutch)

There are many reasons why I might just be a misanthrope. All 3 of my books deal with a problematic monkey race controlled by the servants of 'death'. I call people monkeys. I show their weaknesses. In the 2nd book, everyone except Jesus is evil. In the 3rd, prejudice is 'created' by those in need of power. I use cliches like there's no tomorrow (there is no tomorrow, by the way, there is only today)
So, yes, I guess I am...but I love you all, really :-)

 Есть много причин, почему я может быть просто мизантроп. Все 3 из моих книг иметь дело с проблемным обезьяны гонки контролируются слуги "смерть". Я призываю людей обезьян. Я показываю свои слабости. Во 2-й книге, все, кроме Иисуса есть зло. В 3-м, предрассудки «сотворил» тем, кто нуждается власти. Я использую клише, как есть не завтра (нет завтра, кстати, есть только сегодня)
Так что, да, я предполагаю, что я ..но я вас всех люблю, на самом деле :-)

Sok oka van annak, miért lehet csak egy embergyűlölő. Minden 3 könyvem foglalkozik a problémás faj majom által ellenőrzött szolgái "halál". Felhívom az emberek majmok. Megmutatom azok gyengeségeit. A 2. könyvben, mindenki, kivéve Jézus gonosz. A 3., sérelem "készítette" a rászorulók a hatalom. ÉN használ kliséket, mint nincs holnap (nincs holnap, az úton van, csak ma)
Szóval, igen, azt hiszem, én vagyok ..de szeretlek titeket, de tényleg :-)

Er zijn vele redenen waarom ik misschien wel een misantroop. Alle 3 van mijn boeken te gaan met een problematische ras aap gecontroleerd door de dienaren van 'dood'. Ik noem mensen apen. Ik toon hun zwakheden. In de 2e boek, iedereen behalve Jezus is kwaad. In de 3e, wordt prejudice 'gemaakt' door mensen in nood van de macht. Ik gebruik cliches alsof er geen morgen is (er is geen morgen, door de manier, is er alleen vandaag)
Dus ja, ik denk dat ik ben .. maar ik hou van jullie allemaal, echt :-)

Frank Zappa - the opener (English+Russian+Dutch)

I was thinking just exactly when did I start to turn? When did I start to see that drinking, toking, having long hair and adding 'man' to the end of almost every sentence wasn't where it was at? Frank Zappa. At first I thought he was cool because he had different lyrics. Then I realised he was a serious person, only drank coffee and smoked cigarettes. It was the ciggies that killed him, I guess. Robbed the world of one of the few outspoken people from the century. What would he have made of all the shit that's happened since his death?
And that's one of the reasons why I write. Creating clones just won't develop anyone, maybe if you're lucky, it'll put some money into your wallet, but if you write for entertainment WITH obvious and hidden messages, at least the ones who read the books will get something out of them! Unfortunately, one publisher doesn't think my 1st book is 'financially viable'. I beg to differ. Buy my books. Think. Change. Or not, as the case may be. Just enjoy :-)

Я думал, просто именно тогда, когда я начала поворачивать? Когда я начинаю видеть, что питьевая toking, имеющих длинные волосы и добавить «вы» к концу почти в каждом предложении не было, где это было? Frank Zappa. Сначала я думал, что он крутой, потому что он был другим текстом. Тогда я Реализованная он был серьезным человеком, только пил кофе и курил сигареты. Это был ciggies, что его убили, я думаю. Ограбили мире одним из немногих откровенных людей от века. Что бы он сделал из всего того дерьма, что произошло после его смерти?

И это одна из причин, почему я пишу. Создание клонов просто не будет развиваться кто-нибудь, может быть, если вам повезет, это будет вложить деньги в своем кошельке, но если вы пишете для развлечений с явными и скрытыми сообщениями, по крайней мере, те, кто читал книги будет получить что-то из из них! К сожалению, один издатель не думаю, что моя первая книга "финансово жизнеспособными. Я позволю себе не согласиться. Купить мои книги. Подумайте. Изменить. Или нет, в зависимости от обстоятельств может быть. Просто наслаждайтесь :-)

Ik zat net te denken precies wanneer ben ik beginnen te draaien? Wanneer heb ik begin te drinken toking zien, met lang haar en het toevoegen van 'u' aan het einde van bijna elke zin werd niet waar het was? Frank Zappa. In eerste instantie dacht ik dat hij cool was, omdat hij had verschillende teksten. Daarna heb ik Gerealiseerde hij een serieus persoon, dronk alleen koffie en sigaretten gerookt. Het was de ciggies die hem doodde, denk ik. Beroofd de wereld van een van de weinige uitgesproken mensen van de eeuw. Wat zou hij hebben gemaakt van al de shit die er gebeurd is sinds zijn dood?

En dat is een van de redenen waarom ik schrijf. Het maken van klonen gewoon niet ontwikkelen iedereen, misschien als je geluk hebt, het zal wat geld in je portemonnee, maar als je schrijft voor entertainment met voor de hand liggende en verborgen boodschappen, althans degenen die de boeken gelezen zal iets uit van! Helaas, een uitgever niet dat mijn 1e boek is 'financieel haalbaar'. I beg to differ. Koop mijn boeken. Denk na. Wijzigen. Of niet, zoals het geval. Gewoon genieten :-)

Novelette excerpt / отрывок(Google Translated Russian)

Excerpt from the novelette, with Satan and Guido...Отрывок из повести, с Сатаной и Гвидо ...

“Where are we?” The moped stopped and they both got off and observed the place. There was a crowd of people watching some kind of outdoor stage show. The people were dressed in ancient European clothing, while the performers were dressed as Mongolians and singing to the crowd. There was a lot of drinking and dancing. “Was this in my life? I think I would’ve remembered something like this.” Guido walked around, through the crowd and up onto the stage to get a closer look at the singers.

“Mmm, no it wasn’t. It’s in mine. Sorry, dear boy, we seem to be in my memory.” Satan shook his TT. “I don’t know why, give me a moment, please.” Satan sat down on a tree stump and got out some tools.

“What’s happening? What is all this?” Guido was now checking out the performers’ costumes.

“Oh, this? It’s Festival Day in an old Balkan village and some Mongolians are singing. Can’t quite remember when. Does it matter?”

“I thought Mongolians were ruthless people, you know, like Genghis Khan who rode through Europe, slaying all before him.”

“What are you? A History book? Yes, they were dangerous and ‘ruthless’, as you say.” Satan’s TT gave out a puff of smoke as he tinkered with it.

“Nice song.”

“Yes, these people seem to think so.”

“And I like their costumes and decoration.” Guido particularly liked their decorational scimitars.

“That’s not decoration, dear boy.”

“What?”

“Just listen to the song.”

“Yes, it’s excellent.” Guido was getting into the melody and rhythm.

“Excellent? The lyrics, listen to the lyrics.”

“ Sorry, I’m British…was British, we don’t do languages. I couldn’t quite get to grips with French, let alone something highly exotic like Mongolian. Besides, it wasn’t on the syllabus. Really, I haven’t a clue what they’re singing.”

“Neither do they, ha!” Satan gave up on his TT for the moment.

“What are they singing about, then?”

“Oh, the usual. Goes something like ‘We’ve come to burn your houses, slaughter your children, rape your wives and defecate down your headless necks.’ I can’t tell in which order, as time tense in their language isn’t so important.” 


"Где мы?" Мопед остановился, и они оба вышли и наблюдали место. Существовал толпу людей, наблюдающих своего рода открытый сценическое шоу. Люди были одеты в древние европейские одежды, в то время как исполнители были одеты, как монголы и пели в толпе. Существовал много питья и танцев. "Что это в моей жизни? Я думаю, что я бы вспомнил что-то вроде этого. "Guido ходил, сквозь толпу и на сцену, чтобы получить более близкий взгляд на певцов."Ммм, нет, это было не так. Это в шахте. Извини, милый, мы, кажется, в моей памяти. "Сатана покачал TT. "Я не знаю, почему, дай мне минутку, пожалуйста." Сатана сел на пенек и достал инструменты."Что происходит? Что все это значит? "Guido теперь проверить костюмы исполнителей."Ах, это? Это день фестиваля в старой деревне балканских и некоторые монголы поют. Не помню когда. Не все ли равно? ""Я думал, монголы были безжалостны люди, вы знаете, как Чингисхан, который ехал по Европе, убивая все на своем пути"."Что вы? История книги? Да, они были опасны и "безжалостный", как вы говорите. "TT сатаны выдал дым, как он возился с ней."Хорошие песни"."Да, эти люди, кажется, думают так.""А мне нравится их костюмы и украшения." Guido Особенно понравился их decorational ятаганы."Это не украшение, дорогой мальчик»."Что?""Просто послушайте песню"."Да, это отлично." Guido садился в мелодии и ритма."Отличный? Текст песни, слушать песни. ""Извините, я ... что британская British, мы не делаем языках. Я не мог схватиться с французского, не говоря уж что-то вроде монгольской весьма экзотические. Кроме того, он не был на программе. В самом деле, у меня нет понятия, что они поют "."Ни делают они, ха!" Сатана отказался от своего TT на данный момент."Что они поют о, да?""Да как обычно. Идет что-то вроде: "Мы пришли, чтобы сжечь дом, убийство своих детей, насиловать ваших жен и испражняться работу безголовые шеи." Я не могу сказать #, в каком порядке, как время напряженной на их языке это не так важно ".