'Rage' free promo results!

The free 'Rage' promo has now finished :-(... I didn't have much of a chance to promote it in the last 1/2 day of the two, but it did quite well, and I also had a few sales, which put up my 'ranks' on Amazon's author central :-)
Almost 80% of the free downloads of 'rage' were on Amazon.com, but the UK, Germany, France(!), Italy, India and Canada did their bit, too. Thank you to everyone who downloaded :-) I hope you read it and also perhaps...review it? :-)
Here are the rank results from the 'Rage' free 2 day promo...(the best ranks)
Amazon.com - #1,985 (#91 Fantasy>Paranormal & Urban)
Amazon.co.uk - #1,771 (#31 Fantasy>Contemporary)
Amazon.de - #1,787 (#47 Fantasy & SciFi>Fantasy)

With the surprise sales...
Manna-X on Amazon.com - #198,592
Beth Fiasco on Amazon.com - #198,634 

And overall...
Author rank - #112,624
Books - #78,963
Kindle - #44,498
Kindle/Lit+Fic - #15,893
Science Fiction - #5,159
Science Fiction/Fantasy -  #2,179

So, I think a good few days...could be better with some advertising but who's got that money? One day...

'Dani's Shorts' is still free...:-) Spread the word!
https://www.smashwords.com/books/view/351327

Best ranks so far for 'Rage' freebie?

So far (though probably that's it unless there's a surge of downloads tonight :-)) these are the best ranks for 'Rage' on Amazon. Please share the freebie link with all your friends, relatives, workmates, neighbours, acquaintances, people you say 'Hi' to in the street, local shop owners, council workers...
http://www.amazon.com/The-Rage-of-Atlantis-ebook/dp/B008EM2RRK
Amazon.com
#1,985 Free in Kindle Store (See Top 100 Free in Kindle Store)

• #91 in Kindle Store > Kindle eBooks > Literature & Fiction > Fantasy > Paranormal & Urban

Amazon.co.uk

#1,771 Free in Kindle Store (See Top 100 Free in Kindle Store)

• #31 in Kindle Store > Books > Fiction > Fantasy > Contemporary

Amazon.de

#1,787 Kostenfrei in Kindle-Shop (Siehe Top 100 - Kostenfrei in Kindle-Shop)

• Nr. 47 in Kindle-Shop > eBooks > Fremdsprachige eBooks > Englische eBooks > Fantasy & Science Fiction > Fantasy

FREE now! 'Rage' (12+13 September)

Yes, it's free now, so please download it, share it, tell your friends, relatives, workmates :-)
'Rage of Atlantis' - the 'true' story of Atlantis...well, just another interpretation, anyhow...

http://www.amazon.com/The-Rage-of-Atlantis-ebook/dp/B008EM2RRK

The real gold at the end of the rainbow?

A bit of a quite time for me, finished making amendments to 'Macbeth' Dani J Caile / ESL learners style, and the students can't wait to try it out. I got more students than I needed so I had to add parts...now it's great...about 5-10 minutes when performed, hopefully.
Today I found out that the reason someone didn't say 'Hi' yesterday was because they were reading 'Dani's Shorts' on their phone...
...And another friend was very angry / upset this morning, and while travelling to work on public transport, they read a bit of 'Manna-X' (the Moses-Reg bit) and it made them feel much better :-)
The BIGGEST reasons I write is to 1. make people think and 2. give them some entertainment. It looks like I succeeded :-) I'm happy :-)
Tomorrow starts a 2 day FREE promo for 'Rage'...it has three out of three 5 star reviews...SPREAD the WORD, wherever you are, wherever you work, spread it, I'd like to reach a milestone, perhaps even break into the #1000 free ebooks on Amazon.com...who knows?
 http://www.amazon.com/The-Rage-of-Atlantis-ebook/dp/B008EM2RRK
Dolphins Forever!!

Another ESL play in the bag

Last year I had a go at 'Midsummer Night's Dream' with my 6th form ESL class. It was long and difficult, but they finally pulled it off. There's a 30 minute video somewhere...the script and stuff are here...
http://djcshakespeare.yolasite.com/
This year, it's not compulsory, but I'm getting the children who want to try again together, this time do a version of 'Macbeth'. After days of thinking, I put pen to paper, so to speak, and I have a 'role-change' Macbeth play called 'Beth'. It's probably 5-10 minutes long.
Still working on those novelettes...
Thursday and Friday! 'Rage' is FREE! :-)

'Rage' free on Thursday and Friday +

Yes, just a reminder to say 'Rage' will be free on Thursday and Friday.
I'm getting some strange hits from countries which have never come to the blog before, for example, Qatar. All well and good :-)
Busy ATM, working on 2 novelettes, 1 ESL play (Macbeth) and the Challenge stories. Woke up this morning with a great little idea/conspiracy story...Just a few 100 words per day, if I'm lucky.
Looking forward to the 'Rage' promo...are you?

RAGE FREE for 2 days (12-13 September)

Thank you for downloading the latest free 'Bethlehem Fiasco' 1 day promo...it went OK - without advertising, only tweeting and fb-ing...
#3751 on Amazon.com
#2724 on Amazon.co.uk
There were downloads from .com, .co.uk, .de, .in. and .ca...Thank you! I hope you enjoy the read!


Next week, anyone who wants 'Rage' can have it, it's FREE for 2 days! (Thursday and Friday)
http://www.amazon.com/The-Rage-of-Atlantis-ebook/dp/B008EM2RRK
Let's see how it goes :-)

'Beth' FREE + New 'Rage' review!

Yes, 'Bethlehem Fiasco' is FREE today, for another 12+ hours...go to your local Amazon bookstore on the net to get it...here are a few of the tweets I've sent out...
"There are worse things in life than death...have you ever been out with a Czech?"
This book makes 'Life of Brian' look like kids in a paddling pool.
Life of Brian? Tiddlywinks compared to 'Bethlehem Fiasco'
Read it in a day and split your guts.
...you get the idea...
http://www.amazon.com/Bethlehem-Fiasco-Dani-J-Caile/dp/1469989158

Oh, and 'Rage' got another 5* review! ('Rage' will be FREE next Friday (13th September) -I'm doing it for those who read and follow my blog - the number is increasing)
http://www.amazon.com/Rage-Atlantis-Dani-J-Caile/dp/1475163568

Another Winner

By Talleyrand on September 3, 2013

Format: Kindle Edition

From the author of Manna-X... this time the neo-absurdist heir to Kafka takes us to the parallel world of Atlantis. All the Dani Caile tropes are here, the flights of fancy, the philosophy, the cool steampunk mix of old world and new technology. Plus angels, dolphins, hobgoblins and crazy monkeys. This is the kind of book you read for the sheer pleasure of reading. 

 

 

Bethlehem Fiasco 1 day promo 6th Sept

Yes, I'm putting 'Bethlehem Fiasco' ebook on a 1 day FREE promo.
http://www.amazon.com/The-Bethlehem-Fiasco-ebook/dp/B007UJHQ42
There seems to be a lot of hits on 'Beth's reviews ATM, so let's see just how many really would like to read the book :-) And reviewing it would be nice.
I'll post on the day...that's 6th September...this Friday.
I'm keeping up with the Iron Writer Challenge, always good to practise, BUT I've started 2 other book projects...yes, two! One is an 'Inspector Brad Shaw' comedy investigation, the other is a 'Dark Medieval' comedy piece. So, still writing :-)
'Dani's Shorts' is still being downloaded, now with a NEW cover (and working menu :-))
https://www.smashwords.com/books/view/351327

FREE promotion days + UPDATE

I've finally had a look at the 'Promotions Manager' thingy on Amazon properly and it shows I have 5 free days on EACH book. So expect some free days on all the books.
I will be holding a MASSIVE FREE  2 day promo when all my other books (except Manna-X) on October 14th and 15th because I have a special post on EI Jenning's website on October 14th, promoting all my books. So if you want to read ALL of my books and you haven't had the opportunity yet, then...download.
I will, however, be holding promo days before then, as soon as I can enter details  into some free ebook websites.
Working on my next book...:-)
Just looked at Smashwords, people are still downloading 'Dani's Shorts' AND 'TDX2'...SUPER!
Also looked at who's hitting the blog...this month the UK didn't even get into the Top 10!
1. the USA (good on ya)
2. Hungary (yeah!)
3. Hong Kong (??:-))
4.Russia (спасибо)
5. Poland (??:-))
6. Latvia (!!:-))
7. China (I didn't even know they could do that!)
8. Ukraine (:-))
9. France (merci!)
9. South Korea (well...:-))

New Smashwords interview + Dani's Shorts update

Smashwords has a new feature...an interview! You can also choose which questions to answer.
So, here's my shot...

https://www.smashwords.com/interview/DaniJCaile

'Dani's Shorts'...I've finally got the version I want up on Smashwords, but the downloads have...stopped. There were tons of downloads while I was playing around with it, trying to get the menu working properly and the cover the correct size, but now...it was even retweeted by someone with over 70,000 followers...and nothing. Oh well. It's out there. Working on Volume 2. And my next book :-)
Reviews of 'Dani's Shorts' would be much appreciated :-)
https://www.smashwords.com/books/view/351327

'Dani's Shorts' FREE on Smashwords.com UPDATE

Yep, Brian wrote a Foreword for this little collection of short stories and now it's ready!
(UPDATE: Well, 'ready' is relative...forgot to put in a 'hyperlink' for all the chapters back to the Table of Contents and Brian would like the elements mentioned at the intro to each story...it will be done :-))
Please download it, read it and leave a review...
"Dani's Shorts" by Dani J Caile available FREE at Smashwords
Foreword by Brian Y Rogers :-)
https://www.smashwords.com/books/view/351327

Manna-X FREE and Interview and TDX2 review!

Another 'Dani' interview here, by E.I. Jennings, a wonderful writer who gives so much time to other writers it's amazing.One day...
http://indiebrits.eijennings.com/#category1
I also received a wonderful little review of TDX2, on Smashwords and Amazon.com.
https://www.smashwords.com/books/view/273975
Review by: szakib on Aug. 26, 2013 :
Great book, quite original ideas. I also read it from beginning to end in one sitting, it is a real page-turner!

Oh, and 'Manna-X' is FREE again, today! (any Amazon site)...Germany's doing well again :-)
http://www.amazon.com/Manna-X-ebook/dp/B00D94CWF0

Two more 5* reviews of 'Manna-X'

Wow, it's all happening, 2 more great reviews for 'Manna-X'. It's FREEEEEEEEEE again tomorrow as there's an interview (I'll send the link as soon as I have it)
I didn't even notice this review on Goodreads...thanks Dave! (now I know who bought it on the 8th :-)

 

Aug 10, 2013 Dave Cantrell rated it 5 of 5 stars

Irreverent, Absurd, Great Fun.

Some of my religious friends might be offended by this book, but only if they lack a sense of humor. I found the book hilarious and at times thought provoking. Its hard to classify the story. It's a bit Sci-Fi, a bit Fantasy, a good dose of Parody and spiced with Silliness. There is a lot of dialog, almost like reading a play at times. On a few occasions I got lost and had to re-read a section because I read too quickly the first time. This isn't a criticism of the author as much as a warning to slow down and enjoy the story. 

 

And this one on Amazon! Thanks, James!

5.0 out of 5 stars I liked it!, August 25, 2013

By 

james - See all my reviews

Amazon Verified Purchase(What's this?)

This review is from: Manna-X (Kindle Edition)

As a `non-believer' I must say I rather enjoyed the tongue-in-cheek mocking of God, Moses and the like. I thoroughly enjoyed the author's take on certain `historical' events and must say that it reminded me in a way of `The Good Man Jesus and the Scoundrel Christ' by Philip Pullman.
Overall, I enjoyed the book very much, and would recommend it highly to those of you who aren't easily offended when it comes to the true nature of their `faith' to give it a go.
The storyline of Graham's search for the manna machine works well and provides a good base for an entertaining read.

 

2 more great reviews (Manna-X & Bethlehem Fiasco)

2 more great reviews, one 5*, one 4* (I know why...) :-)~


On 'Bethlehem Fiasco'...http://www.amazon.com/The-Bethlehem-Fiasco-ebook/dp/B007UJHQ42

5.0 out of 5 stars Another Absurdist Romp From The New Beckett August 24, 2013

By Talleyrand

Format:Kindle Edition

I had a great time with author Dani J Caile's Manna-X and so I was excited to read this. He has done it again! Another highly original absurdist, sideways look at the meaning of life. This time it's the Jesus story - but with hobgoblins. A real feast for the brain, this witty, Monty Pythonesque tale is recommended for erudite readers in need of comic relief. 

 

And on 'Manna-X'...http://www.amazon.com/Manna-X-ebook/dp/B00D94CWF0

 

4.0 out of 5 stars Serious or not, it's worth taking it., August 24, 2013

By 

PW COLLIER "PETE" (Vancouver, Canada) - See all my reviews

This review is from: Manna-X (Paperback)

I was lost, but now I'm found! - neo-plantonic universe versus neo platonic universe, I get it. The object capable of changing the fabric of both physicality and non-physicality; sure, why not? It reads well, like a screen play, without direction and without setting. You know, this would make the foundation of a great 'Doctor Who' mini-series... maybe, we could get David Tenant back to be Reginald? This is said both in reverence and irreverence to Dani J. Caile's quirky book. I have no idea what I'm talking about. Anyway, read the damn book and you may, I think. 

Manna-X is the product of a wonderfully creative and unusual mind.

It's been a busy week or so. 13,000+ blog views (no more 'robot' views, they've stopped...hopefully, haven't had them for months), 3 free promotion days for Manna-X (a surprise from Germany), a collection of new reviews and now...the first review of 3 or 4 for Manna-X, and 1 for Bethlehem Fiasco coming...AND an interview on Monday (with another FREE day for Manna-X)
So here's the first review, it's a 4* but I know why...you'll find it on Amazon.com, Amazon.co.uk and Goodreads.
http://www.amazon.com/Manna-X-ebook/dp/B00D94CWF0

4.0 out of 5 stars Strangely Addictive, 24 Aug 2013

By 

Bill Nelson - See all my reviews

This review is from: Manna-X (Kindle Edition)

Manna-X is the product of a wonderfully creative and unusual mind. The author takes a "fresh" look at God, religion and spirituality in a satirical romp of quirky-humor, hidden-wisdom and daring fun. I took this with me to the beach and laughed repeatedly. He's invented (or reinvented) some fantasic and off the wall characters. I'll be looking forward to more by Dani Caile. Recommended to anyone with a sense of humor.

Day 3 of 3 'Manna-X' free promotion UPDATE

Got a surprise from Germany (!!). Danke Deutschland!
#207 Kostenfrei in Kindle-Shop 
Nr. 2 in Kindle-Shop > eBooks > Fremdsprachige eBooks > Englische eBooks > Belletristik > Comics
The best on Amazon.com was #2113 and #11 in Lit fiction>Humor (though #3 was possible in another list).

...I have no idea why it's listed as a 'comic'...perhaps it's a translation thing. I hope I don't get tons of reviews from angry Germans saying they thought they'd downloaded a comic...anyway...EXCELLENT! Even got a 'Trilogy' sale (did I say that already?)
Still a few more hours left so I'll update this post if anything happens. Expecting at least 2 reviews and hoping those who downloaded will tell me their honest opinion. 
http://www.amazon.com/Manna-X-ebook/dp/B00D94CWF0
So, the downloads from 3 days of promotion? Well, maybe I won't show the figures (embarrassing? well, triple figures, I'd be very happy to make that many sales...:-)~) Here's where they came from...
Amazon.com - 64%
Amazon.de - 27%
Amazon.co.uk - 7%
Amazon.ca - 2%
Amazon.it - (1 download)
Amazon.in - (1 download)
No one downloaded from France or Spain but perhaps they used .com, like some people in the UK did.
A BIG THANK YOU TO ALL THOSE WHO DOWNLOADED AND I HOPE YOU ENJOY THE READ...YES, READ IT :-)

Day 2 of 3 'Manna-X' FREE promotion UPDATE

Got a few more downloads, but the best numbers of the day were...
#11 in Literature Fiction > Humor
#2113 in the Kindle Store (free)
If I knew how to work the system, 'Manna-X' would've got in the Top 10, probably...
#6 in Science Fiction & Fantasy > Fantasy > Contemporary (estimated from #2113 rating)
I also got a 'sale' in Germany, the 'Trilogy' (wish I'd updated it now...!)...a book I think I'll take off for a while until I can edit it properly, it has old versions of the 1st 3 books.
Will try to put Taz's picture on Reddit again today (without the imbedded text, as they are now banned).
I'll also tweet a bit, fb a bit and see if I can reach anymore 'milestones'....:-)
Some reviews coming too...
...and 'Dani's Shorts'...
UPDATE: Actually, just found out I would've got #3 in Humor&Entertainment>Humor>Comedy, and #5 in Lit&Fiction>Fantasy>Alternative History!!!!) Fantastic, huh? Will update the system once the promo is over and once I figure it out!

Day 1 of 3 - #11 Literature Fiction Humor

Yes! Just got into triple figures with the downloads of 'Manna-X' and broke the #2500 barrier in ranking (#2359) and got #11 Literature Fiction Humor. I hope that today can get me into the Top 10. Now that would be something.
Looking forward to some reviews, too, any would be good. 2 are coming that I know of.
And just waiting for a foreword for the collection of short stories...here's the cover...

...and I just put this up on twitter...even Tasmanian Devils think it's tasty :-)

FREE promotion ON...Day 1 of 3

You probably guessed it....'Manna-X' is free for 3 days starting now.
I've tweeted, will continue to tweet, fb-ed, gone to a few ebook sites....nothing...
So, please, if you haven't got it yet, take it now :-)
http://www.amazon.com/Manna-X-ebook/dp/B00D94CWF0
10 out of 10 readers prefer 'Manna-X' :-)

Manna-X FREE Promotion

'Manna-X' will be free TOMORROW...and the next day...and the next day...FREE for 3 days.
I've also had my short stories proofread and they're ready, all I need is a foreword from Brian (Iron Writer Challenge).
..but the big thing is...the promotion.
Already have a new idea for a new book...set in a small village way back in the medieval times...it's going to be fun :-)

8th Fantastic Amazon.com review of 'Manna-X'

This review is from Tony Rand Scott, a fellow sci-fi writer - he's very very good :-)
And again, Adams is mentioned through Hitchikers :-)
Come and read the other reviews here. Perhaps even get the book (which will be free 21+22+23 August).

5.0 out of 5 stars Tongue planted firmly and delightfully into metaphysical cheek! August 17, 2013

By Tony Rand Scott

Format:Kindle Edition

What if God was an entity know as Reginald? What if he had accidentally given a mortal "monkey" the most powerful object in the universe, and then had allowed him to "borrow" it for a while. When the Overlords arrive for an inspection, ready to fine Reginald for requesting a code 237-Manna-X and wanting to check on it, he realizes he must get it back;if he can find it. Thus the race to find the Manna-X begins. Add Moses and the big misunderstanding at the burning bush, Graham Reader more commonly known on earth as the Grim Reaper, the underworlds version of Abbott and Costello in Satan and Lucifer with their Keystone Cop -like hobgoblin henchmen, a romance starved Librarian named Alicia with a serious case of brother envy,the egnimatic Zir, and the Overlords themselves, Bob's 1 through 4 , who come down to "physicality" and have to struggle with the age old issues of hunger and fist to cuffs. Often irreverent, always entertaining, Manna-X will draw you into its amusing and amazing story reminiscent of Douglas Adams, but it will keep you riveted with its original and quirky universe and characters. If you like the Hitchhiker series, you will love this book.

Manna-X in the newspaper!

Yes, I did get into my local newspaper! How did I do that? With a little bit of cheek, I guess.
It's not much of a step but it's the first time I've ever had a mention in a real live newpaper.
...so I guess it is a step forward...a little...
I had to cut the date onto the top of the image from the top left of the page. This article was 1/6 of a page. If you had to pay for that kind of exposure it would cost a lot! Some review lines would've been good, too. But hey! Cool...

Free promotion days!

Thought I'd write a post...
My personal Iron Writer Challenge collection is coming along nicely, just wating for Challenge 26 elements, then I'll write the story, format the book and put it on Smashwords. Let's see who is out there...
This week another writer I'm acquainted with reached the #100 Amazon rating while doing a free promotion day. So I've decided to do a 'Free for 3 days' promotion on Amazon next week, Wednesday, Thursday and Friday (21-23 August), tweet it around and fb it, see what happens. I'll try and make sure the short story collection corresponds with that, too.
Apparantly I had an article in my local newspaper (The Hunts Post, UK) about my book, but I can't find it anywhere, I think they're not telling the truth...if anyone can find it, please send it to me.
...others not telling the truth. I finally got proof that there are a lot of self-published writers who cheat with their Amazon reviews. I choose not to join them. One writer had almost 100 5* reviews and yet the book was far from that. Ethics. Perhaps I'll get a thousand 1* reviews from them now...:-( Already had some Spanish woman call me an arsehole...1. she doesn't know me, if she did then she would be free to call me that, and 2. she didn't read the book. Why do I always get the crap? WHy can't people just read the books? Why can't my books be 'taken away' by an Amazon storm? We'll see next week...

7th review of 'Manna-X' :-)

Won Iron Writer Challenge 23, thanks to you and all my friends :-) That means I'll have 3 stories in the Winners compilation AND I have a place in the next Tournament.
Still working on my own compilation, only one more set of elements to go.

And here's 'Manna-X' review number 7!!!
http://www.amazon.com/Manna-X-ebook/product-reviews/B00D94CWF0

5.0 out of 5 stars Absurd, Irreverent & very funny., August 9, 2013

By 

D&R (California) - See all my reviews

Amazon Verified Purchase(What's this?)

This review is from: Manna-X (Kindle Edition)

This is an unusual yarn, with a bureaucratic God, hobgoblins, and whole new take on biblical stories. It may offend some readers, but loved it.

Another FANTASTIC 5* review of 'Manna-X'

Another 5 star review, this time from fellow writer Damian Stevenson! He's a good writer of dark thrillers and (name dropping) has worked with Steven Spielberg! Here's his review on Amazon.com (and Amazon.co.uk as 'Book Babe' and on Goodreads, too.

5.0 out of 5 stars Mind Twister, August 3, 2013 (Compelling Prose)

By 

Damian Stevenson "Author of 'The Ian Fleming ... (Los Angeles, California, USA) - See all my reviews

This review is from: Manna-X (Kindle Edition)

This is a must read for fans of absurdist literature, especially 'Waiting For Godot.' It's a satirical look at the meaning of existence told with a sly sense of humor. The characterizations are smart. The author has a definite ear for dialogue. Overall, this is a clever, witty and highly original tale that takes the meaning of life as its theme and manages to craft a thought provoking and entertaining narrative without drifting into pretentiousness.

Challenge 23

Yet another one to vote for, PLEASE...'Cynthia the Robot'...probably the last...I have 'Hello Kitty' pink all over my hair...:-(
This one is based on a girl in class who knows how to 'overact', shall we say....

http://theironwriter.com/the-stories/challenge-23/

An interview with my daughter??? Manna-X

Had a strange few minutes the other day. My daughter came up to me and asked me a few questions and it felt like an interview...
Daughter: What you doing?
Me: I'm checking typos in my new book.
Daughter: What new book?
Me: Manna-X. My latest reviewer said he found a few things, I'm just checking them out.
Daughter: What is it about?
Me: ...good question.
Daughter: You don't know?
Me: Err...you know you like Kinder Surprise?
Daughter: Yes. Can I have one?
Me: Later. Well, what happens when you get one?
Daughter: I open it up. [Other daughter] eats the chocolate and I get the toy. Is there one in the drawer?
Me: No. And then?
Daughter: I have a toy. What's in the drawer?
Me: Not much. Then what do you do with it, the Kinder toy?
Daughter: I play with it.
Me: For about 2 minutes, yeah.
Daughter: Daddy, can we go to the playground?
...it kinda broke off after that but the point is...[spoiler]...and in 'Waiting for Godot'...[spoiler]...and in 'Rosencrantz and Guildenstern are Dead'...[spoiler]...so, if you're intrigued to know the connection, maybe you should read 'Manna-X' and see it for yourself...it could change the way you see things :-)

Another great 5 star review coming :-) ...soon...

Yet another GREAT review of Manna-X

Yet another GREAT review of 'Manna-X' from Toni Dare, a fantastic writer. (On Amazon.com, Amazon.co.uk and Goodreads)
(Anonymous' review is wonderful, but it has 4 stars, kinda breaks up the set...if only she knew that Alicia is partly based on her...)
Well, here's Toni's review :-)

5.0 out of 5 stars Gripping prose leaves you wanting more July 26, 2013

By Avvia

Format:Kindle Edition

A wickedly satirical poke at the origins of man with a Darwinian bent. Caile presents readers with the concept of overlords - more like absentee landlords who are entrenched in their own notions of superiority - whose responsibility it is to observe and police the physical world. Quick to punish underlings for rule infractions and deride humans as primates, their underwhelming attempts at managing score an epic fail. A journey into physicality - the human world - highlights their hubris as they fumble around unable to assimilate the reality of the world they oversee.

Yet another Iron Writer Challenge...

Yes, I'm up for another Iron Writer, Challenge 23. http://theironwriter.com/2013/07/25/challenge-23-july-25-2013/
I hope you can vote for it, wherever you are. You can even clear your cache and vote again. Maybe another browser or computer will do it too :-) Not that I'm putting any ideas in your heads :-)
Written 25 Iron Writer stories, now I'm waiting for the next 3 Challenges and I'll put them all out in a compilation for free on Smashwords. I've just been reading a few and modesty stops me from telling you how good they are...no, it didn't :-)

Short stories

Written over twenty 500 word stories based on the Iron Writer elements now, every one of them a corker.
Some are comical, some are tragi-comical while others are parodies...there's even an 'epitaph', well, dialogue story based on the antics of my 2 wonderful but sadly deceased glassfish. Now all I have to do is wait a month to collect 6 months of elements, write the last few remaining stories and 'publish' it on Smashwords for FREE...yes, I said for FREE.
Waiting on a few 'Manna-X' reviews...and possibly 1 Man by a tree and 1 Bethlehem Fiasco (I think that one's going to take a while...)

4th review of 'Manna-X' on Amazon!

Read this review...isn't it so fantastic? Elizabeth A Lance is another very talented writer and I feel honoured that she was able to read and then review my book 'Manna-X'. She's also just bought 'Man by a tree' - I guess because she says she fell in love with Graham :-) ...rings a bell...

Out of 5 reviews (4 on Amazon.com, 3 on Amazon.co.uk (2 repeats))...four 5 stars and one 4 star!

5.0 out of 5 stars Captivating and extremely entertaining!, July 21, 2013

By 

Elizabeth "Elizabeth A. Lance" - See all my reviews

This review is from: Manna-X (Kindle Edition)

I had no idea what to expect when I received a copy of Manna X, but I am so glad I read this quirky and entertaining book! The characters were hilarious, from the befuddled God [Reginald] to the bumbling Sniff and Grint, you just can't help but love each and every character in this story! My favorite characters though were Lucifer~Don't call me Luci ( he was just perfect) And Graham, I really sort of fell in love with Graham aka Mr. Death. As soon as my contract is up, I fully expect to meet him on the other side! Alicia, too, was just the right touch as the human character in the story. I don't want to give too much away, but if you have a sense of humor and aren't too much of a religious fanatic, you will really enjoy this brilliantly told tale. It was a quirky and entertaining read that so captivated my imagination I read it straight through because I couldn't put it down! Well done Mr. Caile! I am very much looking forward to reading more of your work!

Chances, Changes and Ranks

Newspaper Article Chance
Had a few e-mails from a newspaper in England yesterday, but nothing since then. Who knows, huh?
The 'Reginald' Change...
TDX2 has been changed, Manna-X has finally been changed, and Rage, Bethlehem Fiasco and Man by a tree are all edited, and will be going through the process soon.
Ranks
Looked up my Amazon Author Rating...I was 88,702 at the beginning of July :-) (Kindle 44,259!) that's when I had some sales ...but right now I'm at 388,930 (Kindle 161,544), slipping from a high point of 101,044. Oh, to stay in the top 100,000...such a dream!
But hang on, it gets better.... Literature & Fiction: Top:18,412 Now: 87,650...Science Fiction & Fantasy : Top: 6,287 Now: 16,749...Fantasy: Top: 2,704 Now: 10,234
My word, I like those figures...now if I can just get a decent number of sales...:-)

3rd review on Amazon.co.uk for 'Manna-X'

Here's the 3rd review for 'Manna-X' from one of my loyal readers :-) Thanks!
See it here (Amazon.co.uk) along with the others or below...

5.0 out of 5 stars Manna-X 16 July 2013

By Frank Clark

Format:Paperback|Amazon Verified Purchase

Another of Dani J Caile's fantastic tales of the "other world"
Time has no boundaries in the quest for the Manna-X, with wonderful adventures across the centuries for the heaven and hell teams we have met in his earlier books.
As with all of Dani's work, vibrant dialogue brings the story to life, painting a vivid picture of the search and trials with bureaucracy met with along the way.
Great characters, great dialogue, great plot, great read.

Comment about 'Manna-X' (authonomy 16 July 2013)

It's all happening...
Got 100 votes (so far) for my 500 word story in the Iron Writer Summer Open. 3rd place in my group of 4, though...the leader has 144 votes, but he's been in the writing business for over 30 years! Not my first 'loss'...

Anyway, got a nice comment on authonomy.com from a...
Charles Knightley...

Manna-X
Dani J Caile

A fast paced prologue which hooked me. The next few chapter were full of wry humour, but what have you got against Tom Cruise? Your scenes with God and Michael with Gabriel and then Moses was a laugh.
In chapter three, by bipedals did you mean bipeds? Or is there some hidden meaning?
All in all a good read which has been very well written and I've highly starred.

Charles Knightley
The Secret of Netley Abbey
(at No.4, ready for the Editor's Desk!)

New review of 'Man by a tree' July 2013

Just added the comment made by my favourite Literature tutor as a review on Man by a Tree here..

But, of course, here it is anyway...

5.0 out of 5 stars Review from Literature tutor January 11, 2013

By If Jedlica

Format:Paperback

Hidden away in the comments is a paragraph from my favourite Literature tutor from college which was written in July 2013 (she's got a phD in Literature, you know...:-))

"Man by a Tree is a novel containing all the required ingredients of a good storyline within the genre of fantasy literature. For readers who enjoy witty humour, lots of dialogue, a host of supernatural elements (angels, hobgoblins, devils, etc.) and continuous action, this is certainly a good read. Once started it is impossible to put down. I highly recommend it to all who want to enjoy a light summer read that manages to relieve stress. It's fun."
..and she also wrote elsewhere...
"I would give a 5 for this one."
...so I did :-)

She also wrote this about Bethlehem Fiasco (she's halfway through)...
"Not bad...it's like a biblical story made into a cocktail drink..."
I think that's the best quote yet!

Stage 1: Iron Writers Summer Open Update

Looks like I lose, probably get 4th place too, but at this moment in time with 4 days left...
1st place - 105 - A guy who's been writing since 1977, tons of books, tons of readers/groups
2nd place - 78 - nice story
3rd place - 63 - me, with a really great story about the BBC
4th place - 48 - nice story
So, Iron Writer is 'who you know' and not 'what you know'...
Just been to England for 2 weeks, read a bit, watched a bit, went to a few places, such as the House of Commons to watch a debate, it was very interesting but their toilets...you'd expect them to be better than that. Madame Ts toilets were the worst, you pay a lot of money to get in and then get a cupboard for a toilet.
Reading "Black Elk Speaks", and "Dark Space2", and a few other ebooks ATM.
Waiting on some more reviews...
My favourite Literature lecturer read 'Man by a tree' the other week, and thought it was good, she caught most of the classics in it and said..."Once started I just couldn't put it down, I had this
uncontrollable urge to keep going."
She'd give a 5 star when/if she writes a review :-)
And you? How are you doing with my books?
DO you have any thoughts on my 500 word stories? I will be bringing out a cluster of them for FREE on Smashwords later.

3rd review of 'Manna-X' :-)

A 3rd review on Amazon.com, from Anonymous - I can guess who it is, thank you.
http://www.amazon.com/Manna-X-ebook/product-reviews/B00D94CWF0

Here it is, so true...(4 stars! Come on!)

4.0 out of 5 stars It's worth reading, July 12, 2013

By 

Anonymous - See all my reviews

This review is from: Manna-X (Paperback)

This is the kind of book that makes one reader say to another 'It's worth reading'. (Except if the particular reader is a catholic priest with no sense of humour.)
The book never takes itself/anything too seriously (not even the Bible). It both imitates and makes fun of today's popular fiction (The Da Vinci Code, The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo etc.) at the same time. However, imitation does not turn into copying any of them, on the contrary, Manna-X has a plot that is original and entertaining enough to make you want to read the whole story without taking a break.
Making allusions to modern bestsellers and paying homage to great literary classics do not exclude each other in the book: the author is obviously a great admirer of Beckett's Waiting for Godot...
No page without a joke, no biblical character or event that is interpreted in the usual way. Surprising, innovative style, at some points downright provocative. (Moses loved animals....)
So, read this book. And then, pass it on. It's worth reading.

Stage 1 : Summer Open Iron Writer Competition

Another competition! Please come and read and vote (for Dani J Caile :-))
http://theironwriter.com/tournament/conrad-division/
I really need the votes...and my story is the best!
You should also go and vote for my colleague Tannis Laidlaw here...
http://theironwriter.com/tournament/charlotte-bronte/

If I can get through Stage 1, then I have a chance of a little advertising and a FREE book cover!
So, message around, ask your friends, we're both up against people with a LOT of friends...I don't think I'll get through this 1st stage, but we can but try...

New interview online (by Clive Eaton)

Yes, yet another interview, this time about 'Manna-X' and tons of other things like 'genre' and 'writing process'. It's definitely worth a look :-) But then I would say that, wouldn't I?
http://www.cliveeaton.com/danijcaile.html

The Iron Writer Summer Open will begin in a day or two. I'll post the link to those stories I feel need your support. I could win a little exposure and a FREE book cover! (though I doubt it, I'll need a lot of support)...good 500 word story, though.

Long time, no post...

Been travelling to the homeland this last week or two, still there...
I've got a 'Guest Post' on Laurence O'Bryan's website called "Why write at all"...
I'm also in the Summer Open for the Iron Writer Challenge, I don't think I'll go through to the Summer Final, I've been put in a table with 3 authors who know more people than me...:-( My story is great, of course, mainly dialogue and plays around with the BBC and religion/old boy network, and also a little dig at Prudential, calling them 'Crudential' (crude, if ya didn't get it...well, okay, crap Pru, then).
One reader finished 'Manna-X', a young student, and she loved the book, especially the 4 overlords, the relationship between Satan and Lucifer, the...etc, etc :-) Thank you for reading it, Dia :-)
Maybe you guys and girls should read it too :-) http://www.amazon.com/Manna-X-Dani-J-Caile/dp/1490371702

Reginald

Finished 3 years of college, finally! While I was waiting for my last oral exam, I asked my fellow students if they'd read one of my books and one of them said "I'd never read one of your 'religion' books."
Religion? My books are anti-establishment, anti-church, anti-politics, anti-civilisation, anti-whatever, but not 'religion' or even 'religious' - what do you expect from L2 students...
So I thought...and I think I'm going to change the name 'God' to 'Reginald' as I had originally planned to do before finishing 'Man by a tree'. I used the word 'God' because I thought that would help the reader but now I see that it might have turned readers away...so those with an old copy of one of my books, you might be holding onto a 'collector's item' if I ever get famous (yeah, right)! So, I'll gradually be changing all the books from now on....might take a few weeks or a month, though.
UPDATE: 'Manna-X' is in the process already, will be ready tomorrow, I hope...:-)

One piece of paper makes a difference?

Why yes, of course it does. It may be a mere piece of paper, but depending on what's printed on it, it can open or close doors. It is so strange that one piece of paper can have so much power...
I'm not just talking about my BA here (which I've just got, by the way) but other paper, too, medical papers, immigration papers, business papers, etc, etc.
Here's the old Hungarian 'bear' and 'deathlist' joke...:-)

The bear writes a death list. News of his death list spread across the forest like wildfire. 
Some of the animals who hear about it decide to go ask the bear about the list, thinking, that living in uncertainty is worse than knowing for certain that a bear is going to eat you. 
So, the fox goes to the bear and asks him about the list.
'Excuse me bear, is it true that you have a death list?' asks the fox.
`Yes.' says the bear.
`Well... is my name on it?'
`I don't know, let me check...' says the bear, and then he pulls out the death list. `Yes, you're on the list.'
And the bear eats the fox.
A few days later the wolf comes by and asks the bear about the list.
`Excuse me bear, is it true that you wrote a death list?' asks the wolf.
`Yes.' says the bear.
`Okay... is my name on it?'
`I don't know, let me check... Yep, afraid so...'
And the bear eats the wolf.
A couple of days later the rabbit comes by and asks the bear about the death list.
`Excuse me bear, is it true that you have a death list?' asks the rabbit.
`Yes.' says the bear.
`Tell me... is my name on it?'
`I don't know, let me check... Yes, afraid so, you're on the list'
`Excuse me bear... but couldn't you... take my name off the list?'
`Why not?'

Manna-X copies :-)

Just received a few copies of 'Manna-X'...it looks VERY good, infact it's a little bigger than I'd planned, but then it's a BIG BOOK. So, go get a copy, you won't regret it! It should be in the shops, but unfortunately no big publisher 'gives a shit'.
The latest comment about 'Manna-X' is that it's 'irreverant'...yes, definitely 'anti-church' but that's not all that's in it, there are some laughs and complete craziness. So if you like a laugh but hate the church, go and have a look at it. Of course, there's always 'Bethlehem Fiasco' too, if you really want to see 'church-bashing' :-) And 'Man by a tree' for true irreverance...and 'Rage' for anti-civilisation!
Well over 10,000 hits for the blog now...but then someone put the flea in my ear and said it was all robots, those sites which are databases that collect information by hitting your site. I checked the 'traffic sources' (because you can do that) and there are a few 'robots' but less than 10% of last month from a 'filmhill.com' or something. The mass majority of you are 'human' or 'monkey', take your pick :-) It would be nice if some of you who are looking would actually buy too! 'Manna-X' would be a nice start. How many links to 'Manna-X' can I put in one post...?

Random 'Manna-X' excerpt 5 - page 113 (ish)

Lucky strike for excerpt 5! Satan and Lucifer in a restaurant. The funny thing about this is (really?) is that this happened in real life with beer. They'd run out of half pint glasses and only had pints. I only wanted a half but they wouldn't pour half into a full pint glass because I could've been an inspector...get that.

"Excuse me?" Satan clicked his fingers together and Lucifer tried to disappear. The waiter took his time coming over.

"Yes...sir?"

"I'd like a soup."

"A soup, sir?"

"Yes. You do have them, don't you?"

"This is a restaurant, sir, we have soup. See?" The waiter pointed to some now empty tables filled with bowls of brimming hot soup, untouched.

"Yes, I see. That's a lot of uneaten soup."

"Yes, sir."

"I'd like a thick, creamy, mushroom soup. And you, Luci?" Lucifer was halfway off the table, trying to escape.

"Me? Oh, err, onion, onion soup."

The waiter jotted it down on his pad.

"Small portions. Don't want to put on any more weight." Satan gave his infamous smile.

"I'm sorry, sir, the small portions are all sold out today. We only have large portions left."

"Oh." Satan looked at Lucifer.

"I can see the logic in that." Lucifer pointed at all the empty tables.

"Oh, okay, we'll have large portions, then."

"Absolutely, sir. Would you like a drink, sir?"

"Why? You offering?"

The waiter paused for a moment and left with the soup order. Satan got back to his story.

"Anyway, where was I?"

"Being irritating."

Blog hits versus Sales?

With over 10,000 hits on my blog now I was thinking, if I had that many sales, I'd be a very happy person for 2 reasons.
The 1st reason is that there would be a lot more readers who gave my style of writing a CHANCE and so gave THEMSELVES a chance to grow, to move away from the CLONE LITERARY MARKET - they want you to buy what they make, they're easy to make, they're formulaic, they keep your brain DEAD for future sales. The CLONE LITERARY MARKET wants you to STAY DUMB.
I want you to THINK FOR YOURSELF. If you buy I'll write you a VAMPIRE book if you really want! Or maybe EROTICA! (ha)
The 2nd reason is that I would've got a bit of money ... 35 cents on a Kindle or about 70 cents on a paperback, that would mean anything between 3500 and 7000 dollars! In Hungary that's a lot of money, enough to allow me to concentrate on finding the PERFECT SENTENCE :-)
On the same matter, thanks to Anonymous with an Á, for buying 'Manna-X'.
By the way, whoever you may be reading this post right now, you too can buy it here (I get a little more royalty actually just over 2 dollars for a paperback!) or on Amazon.com or Amazon.co.uk (where I get much less - but at least YOU will have a book which wants you to GROW!). :-)

Over 10,000 views!! Yippie!

Let's celebrate! The blog has well over 10,000 views now, and the Top 10 countries are...

United States	3075
Hungary	1715
Russia	988
United Kingdom	936
Germany	576
Ukraine	399
Netherlands	377
France	316
Poland	177
Turkey	128

Russia and the Ukraine are the BIG surprises for me but I'm surprised you're here, too :-)
Yesterday I even got a hit from Puerto Rico...
Now, what to write about today? Wrote a few short stories yesterday and had an idea for a book (with no hobgoblins). I plan to write a collection of 500 word stories, using Brian Roger's Challenge elements - it is not only a great exercise, but any one of these stories could be turned into a book...a lifetime's supply of creative ideas! Yes, I could write...FOREVER!!! -find a bridge now :-)~
...I might even start a 'Literary Award'...stop all those CLONES...call it 'The Iceberg Literary Award'...:-)

A definition of today's 'good' literature...

After researching this for my thesis, I found a small subjective list of things a 'good' book should be/have. I'm not talking about what some dead guy thought 'good' literature is - that person can't read today's stuff...he's dead. So anyone who died 50 years ago can't really give an opinion of today's books...if you get my meaning...
I also found that there aren't many books which come close to including all 6 'points', with Coetzee's 'Disgrace' only scoring 5 1/2 out of 6 for his stereotypical black characters (yes, I did check to see whether 'black' was politically correct).
So, a 'good' book (in the opinion of linguists, grammaticians, journalists, reviewers, teachers, students, general readers, writers)...
1. must have a collection of elements such as story, plot, points of view and hooks - it's amazing how many self-published books don't have these...
2. shouldn't be 'formulaic', ie. following a pattern laid down in earlier books from the same / other writers...oh dear, that's most of today's market...filled with clones and copies...
3. should have some meaning and purpose beneath the story / entertainment - many massively popular writers have nothing 'underneath', with their readers 'creating' depth from the books, and so making the writers more 'worthy' of other readers' attention than they should be...
4. should give something back to the reader, in terms of something special or a lesson / moral - so many clones give nothing, only their entertainment value, which quite frankly isn't enough...
5. should contain realistic characters based on the experience of the writer - so many writers have stereotypical or 'commonly defined' characters...(before you mention it, no, I don't personally know God or Satan, but I know a few people who act like they are and so I can create characters based on them and call them God / Satan / Lucifer....etc)
6. should be recognised as such, with reviews, complements and awards - saying that, there are some Booker Prize winners who fail this 'good' literature definition due to sensationalism...not naming any names...(me? I have interviews and a few reviews, won a few small competitions...)
So there you go. Look at the book you're reading right now. Check the list of 6. How does it do?
I'll continue working on an OBJECTIVE definition for the rest of my life (1 second - 50+ years), I've already found out how to 'box' writers into 'clone drawers' (ie. this writer has so and so's style, with so and so's lexical items and so and so's discoursal structure...)

'Manna-X' Head thing

There are two huge influences in 'Manna-X'. One of them is 'Waiting for Godot', with the three hobgoblins playing out the roles with boots, hats and damn craziness of nothingness, along with the four Bobs after they have been...moved. But mainly the hobgoblins.
The other influence is 'The Master and Margarita'. What a book. There's a certain quote by one character which says something like "What use is a head?" I took it many ways :-) Why don't you have a read? It's damn cheap as an ebook. It's worth the money just for the complete King Solomon collection, which includes many fantastic toys such as [censored due to wanting someone to buy the thing].

Interview by the GREAT Paul Dorset

A long time ago, far, far away in a distant galaxy... Paul Dorset 'gave' me an interview. He has 59k followers on twitter, has written a million books, and also has a freebie 'Ryann'.
Here is the interview, it's quite funny as it goes...
http://blog.pauldorset.com/2013/05/author-interview-dani-j-caile.html
I had actually forgotten about this. I did this just before writing 'Manna-X', which now has two 5 star reviews!
I'll hopefully have another soon with another great self-published author :-)